Stand back, I am about to let rip!
OMG, did you know turtles fart? Hmm, evidently they do and if you give them brussel sprouts well, stand back it could get ugly. This according to the staff at the Great Yarmouth Sea Life Centre in Norfolk who feed their turtles brussel sprouts over the festive season as a healthy treat. Unfortunately, with brussels sprouts comes flatulence, and their farts can produce gassy bubbles which then set off the overflow alarms at all ungodly times of the night. So anywho this year the tanks will be partially emptied to accommodate the farting . George the 3ft green turtle is one of their main culprits but staff say he has been keeping his flatulence bubbles to a minimum so far.
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As the turtles say ‘In water, there is nowhere to hide’ ( I know, turtley ridiculous)
But I’m in favour of ‘outing’ the flatulent by ensuring that farting is evidenced by, say, a little puff of coloured smoke. Farting on a crowded bus or train is, after all, a most heinous crime! The culprit should be traceable by a puff of telltale smoke (telltale, get it). Let us spend a moment though to consider the plight of the flatulent turtle…….ok, that’s enough!
Farting in lifts should result in a mandatory death sentence
Or in bookshops Loon
Nice one duncan…
So, if you tie the farts into the alarm system and output to an incendiary device, you can watch turtles blow up.
You have to be nice to turtles.
Bwahaha! Love those ringtones! Maybe the turtles were just trying to ring up a few friends.
Let’s just be glad that the giant turtle which holds up the earth doesn’t have access to Brussels sprouts. Or does it?
Who the hell cares about turtle farts? Get a life man.
We do Dick!
I don’t really care too much for someone with a name like ‘dick’ it speaks volumes!