You Dirty Rat You Ate My Pizza

The Green Eggs Cafe in Pennsylvania is in damage control after a sewer main burst and unleashed a flood of rats into their restaurant. Locals were on hand to film and upload the rodents feasting away.

Feel Like Dabbing Some Pizza Behind Your Ear?

Move over Estee Lauder we have a new scent in town and it will make you hungry for more….introducing “Eau de Pizza Hut”. Yes, the tantalizing stench scent of a “box of Pizza Hut pizza being opened”. Pizza Hut Canada have just  released 110 bottles of the pizza smelling perfume and some lucky Facebook fans will be receiving them. Awesome.

Psst I’m holding out for the  garlic bread scent.

Serial Masturbator Strikes Again

OK, here’s the thing serial masturbator, when you are sitting on a staircase, in an alley, with your pants down around your ankles, spanking the sausage, and two cops tell you to stop,  don’t refuse and tell them to wait until your finished, that’s just gross.

Psst Seattle

2nd Psst Thanks to Craig Berry for the heads up and who adamantly denies it’s about him.

3rd Psst  No Bearman I’m not adding a piece of clipart for this post!!!!

Superman Rang He Wants His Undies Back

Ewh, yesterday as I was doing my regular 440 stair exercises at Jacob’s Ladder when I came across these hanging in the bush. At first I thought maybe they were Bearman’s but on further inspection I realised, probably not. So what would make someone ditch their “comic” undies in a public place?

This Is The Problem With Refund Policies

I think this has been used!!!!!

Oh for crying out loud, when a Florida man returned several enema kits to a store for a refund the staff whacked them back on the shelves after he claimed he hadn’t used them. Yes loons, of course he had lied, they had all been friggin used. Gross.

Elephant Poo Paper

Seems there is more than one use for elephant poo. Who knew? Yep, seems you can turn the turds into paper. Lots and lots of it! It’s the brainchild of Queensland zookeeper, Tim Husband, who was desperately trying to save elephants in Indonesia from slaughter. Now locals collect piles and piles of shit to make paper to flog to tourists. One pile of dung makes 15 sheets of high quality pachyderm poo paper.

The Photos You Don’t Want To See

Oh my, if you have ever seen a gyno  in the town of Schifferstadt in Germany, you may not like what you are about to read. A 56 year old  gynecologist has been arrested after taking photos of about 3,000 women’s “you know whats”, without their knowledge. Egads, that’s some collection. Police have seized about 35,000 awkwardly embarrassing photos of his naked patients. So far 700 victims have come forward. Sheez, how would you identify your…ah never mind. The sick doc is now facing a year in jail, while the women face a lifetime of embarrassment.

Psst Pity the fool who has to sort out the doctors collection.

Friggin Deadly Blowfish Testicles

Ooh, there goes the blowfish statistics for this year

People, eating blowfish testicles is wrong, OK! Hmm, this is what seven Japanese  discovered after eating the deadly delicacy. They are all now in hospital unable to feel their hands or legs. OK, it was tempting I must say, raw blowfish and their baked testes, but it is hell dangerous (Japanese roulette). With a nice tempting name, fugu, if not prepared properly it can lead the diner to an early grave (in minutes). To make matters worse the restaurant in question, did not have a licence from the provincial administration which is absolutely necessary. The blowfish contains tetrodotoxin in its organs, an evil neurotoxin that can cause death in minutes if not removed by an experience chef. Death by blowfish happens at least three times a year in Japan. Why the hell would anyone eat something so dangerous you say? Well it has long been rumored that if by some chance you die, it is customary that the chef commits hari kari (supposedly this is the insurance that the meal will be safe). The restaurant in question was called Kibunya located in Tsuruoka, an old castle town by the Sea of Japan (just in case you were interested).

Damn Vermin

Well life gets so much easier when government authorities print a “name and shame” list of restaurants and food premises who have failed the health standards test. Western Australia is just one of many States in Australia who are now publicly outing filthy establishments in their neighborhood. Yippee, under new legislation, all successful prosecutions of breaches of the Food Standards Code or WA Health Act will be published on the WA Health Department website.The health minister for Western Australia says “People have a right to know whether the places they are eating in or where their food is being processed are operating safely,” Too right, I need to know what vermin is in which curry for goodness sakes.
Wanna see the list so far ? OK here it is, just click onto the PDF file link and viola, all the places you might want to reconsider frequenting…  WA Health Department.

Chi Restaurant , 166 Murray Street, Perth
Maya Masala, 49 – 51 Lake Street, Perth
Subway, Carillion City, Perth
The Emperors Court, 66 Latke Street, Perth
Kiplings Indian Cuisine, 2/123 James Street, Northbridge
Upper Crust Patisserie, Unit 5, 268 Belmont Avenue, Cloverdale
Continental Bakery, 427 Carrington Street, Hamilton Hill
Farmer Jacks Midland and Stratton, Midland and Stratton
Red Rooster, Canning Vale
Thien Truong, Shop 12, The Vale Shopping Centre, 271 Amherst Road, Canning Vale
IGA, Girrawheen Shopping Centre, Girrawheen
Lein My Thi Duong a, Shop Newpark Shopping Centre, Templeton Crescent, Girrawheen
Nam To, Shop E2, Koondoola Avenue, Koondoola
Nguyen Dinh Nguyen, Ocean Keys Shopping Centre, Shop 58/36 ocean Keys Boulevard, Clarkson
McDonald’s Family Restaurant, 182 Wanneroo Road, Landsdale
McDonald’s, Kwinana Hub Shopping Centre, Kwinana
Coles, Kwinana Hub Shopping Centre, Kwinana

It Aint No Superbowl!

Hello, need some help here!

You always know when a toilet seat is involved in a story it is never pretty. Kathleen Hewko’s toilet seat horror began when she went off for a tinkle at the Starters Pub bathroom (sports bar) in Allentown, Pennsylvania. Just having recovered from hip surgery she was having a great time until nature called, so she toddled off to the bathroom and plopped herself down on the handicapped toilet seat when all of sudden it cracked and dumped her into the bowl (oh dear god, public toilet, ewh!). Oh and there she sat wedged for 20 minutes inside the toilet bowl before someone found her.She is now suing the Sports bar and also Starters and Kohler Co who made the dodgy seat. I hope she didn’t forget to wash her hands!