What A Dick

Oh, of all the cockamamie  things to do, a Florida man, visiting his wife in jail, pulled out his penis to show the missus via the closed circuit TV and got himself thrown in jail too. Well that’s indecent exposure right there.

What a Greeting Card!

A man has been arrested for exposing himself in a Hallmark store in Pennsylvania.Hmm, a flash card?

Just Blowing In The Wind!

Word of warning man in Merc, do not stand up and expose yourself through your sunroof in front of an off duty cop and his family, even if you do live in Florida. That’s an arresting right there!

Maybe He Should Have Ask For A Breast?

OK, here’s the thing mister, you don’t go exposing yourself at a North Carolina  fast food joint just because they ran out of chicken legs, have you no pride? Hmm, it’s been alleged that Jason Gross, who was a passenger in car, slowly flashed his penis at a drive thru worker after being told they had no more chicken legs. The employee said Mr Gross swore at her then declared he had a  “leg for you” before slowly revealing his genitals. Hmm, she then went on to say  “It’s going to be forever ingrained in my head.” Ain’t that the truth!

Welcome To My Lair

OK here’s the thing sick little puppy, if you are going to flash your genitals and masturbate at a little kid, don’t invite the police into your house if you have friggin child pornography stuck on your walls and bedhead. Sheez, show some decorum! John  Kohler admitted to exposing himself and possessing pictures, videos and files of child pornography after inviting the cops into his apartment .

Want sauce with that?

Pants On The Ground

Really?

Oh for crying out loud Michael Polley, don’t be answering the door with your pants down around your ankles when the police come a knocking after a complaint you exposed yourself. You kinda look friggin guilty. Earlier Polley allegedly pulled down his daks to reveal he was wearing no undies and then proceeded to wiggle his junk at a woman and her children outside her Mesa apartment.

Wanker

Ewh, you know what I hate? When you go to a school library and some fool exposes himself and then ejaculates on your arm . I really friggin hate that! Oritse Ayu from Maryland was arrested after being identified from the Montgomery College surveillance footage. It is alleged Ayu ejaculated on the woman as she was reading then when she turned around he flashed his penis at her. Lucky there is plenty of DNA evidence.

It Was Worth a Try!

Check it out!

OK here’s the thing Anthony Joseph Urga, exposing your penis and saying you have a flesh eating bacteria ain’t gonna cut it with employees of Radio Shack, damn you. After two clerks spotted Mr Urga allegedly nicking stuff, they confronted him. OK, he returned the ipods he’d stolen but when they asked to search his backpack….well, he dropped his pants, flashed his penis and threatened to expose them to a ‘flesh eating bacteria’ (as you do). When that didn’t impress them he drew a knife but by then they had already tackled him (obviously not scared of the bacteria…or an exposed penis!!!). Anywho, due to a medical condition the King County jail refused to take him so they drove him to the emergency room of the Harborview Medical Center where he promptly walked out. There is now  $50,000 warrant out for his arrest. The circle of life!

Getting a Morning Glory Jump Start

OK, here’s the thing mister, having a solo sex romp on a trampoline early in the morning is fine, but just make sure  no one is watching! James Burden from Westquarter, Scotland, decided it would be fun to get naked and masturbate on a trampoline, unfortunately he wasn’t expecting any on lookers. The woman told the court she saw Mr Burden from her window stark naked with a cigarette in one hand and his genitals in the other. Now there’s multi-tasking for ya!  Mr Burden pleaded guilty  to publicly exposing his person in a shameless and indecent manner.

Psst Pity the kid who used the trampoline next! Tad slippery!

Not So Flash

He seems pleasant!

Ian Thomas Rushing might just be the St. Helens flasher, he fits the description for starters. OK, he has admitted to a few flashings here and there. Seems Mr Rushing exposed himself to several women at a laundromat in St Helens and witnesses were able to describe his  decaying front tooth and his silver late-model mini getaway van. After a bit of media coverage it wasn’t long before people began pointing fingers at Mr Rushing.