Is That a Gun In Your Pocket

Not happy with just throwing a shoe at a political rival, Mohammed Shawabka went for his gun on live TV. Hmm, moral of the story is never call a Jordanian politician a Mossad Agent.

Need a Cushion Honey?

A police officer in Pennsylvania accidentally shot his wife in the bum while showing his gun to friends and family.

The Dangers of Bed Bouncing

OK Loons, the moral of this story is, never,ever hide a gun between two mattresses if you have a 5 year old in the house because if she happens to bounce on the bed….. KABOOM…. a bullet right through her ankle.

Want sauce with that?

That’s Using Your Finger

A quick thinking New York cop saved himself from a bullet by wedging his finger between the gun hammer and cylinder after a man put a revolver to his stomach. Yeah, OK, he got his ring finger broken for his troubles but he avoided his own funeral. Bravo Sergeant Michael Miller.

Want sauce with that?

First Date Fail

You know what I hate? When you are going out on a first date and you accidentally shoot yourself with your gun. I really friggin hate that. The couple from North Carolina had just finished a meal when the guy got into his car and kaboom, right through his leg.

Dagnabbit, Now I Have To Reload!

Steady, aim, fire…oh crap, are you OK? An 85 year man is recovering after being accidentally shot in the face by a woman as she tried to shoot a possum in a chook pen. Don’t worry loons, she shot the possum before ringing police!

Cigarette Lighters Can Kill

OK, here’s the thing lady, that novelty cigarette lighter you found outside your mobile home was in fact a .22 Derringer revolver, which will explain why your daughter is in hospital with a bullet wound to her arm. Whoopsie. When Rachel Avila found the miniature gun on the ground she pulled the trigger thinking it was a novelty lighter but when it didn’t work she pulled the trigger again. This time a bullet flew out of the gun, ricocheted off the ground and hit her daughter.

Who’s The Chump Now Fools?

Moral of the story…… never give a chimp an AK47!

Look At My New Toy Mom!

An 8 year old brings a loaded gun to his Queens elementary school and sells it to his classmate for $3….priceless. The incident was uncovered when the second boy showed his bargain to his mom when he got home. School officials in Flushing contacted police after one very angry mom rocked up with a “please friggin explain”. Both the little kid and his dad (who owned the Taurus 9 mm) were promptly arrested.

At Least You Were Clean!

OK, here’s the thing Timothy Chapek, when breaking into a house don’t be taking no shower because the owner and his two German Shepherds may return home during the middle of it, forcing you to ring 911 because you’re scared he has a gun. Chapek had broken into the Portland home and was taking a shower (as you do) when the owner returned and confronted him. Quick thinking Chapek locked himself in the bathroom and rang 911 fearing the owner may a) set the dogs onto him or b) shoot him. Either way it was a lose/lose so he rang the cops for the trifecta!