Shawstink Redemption

A man in Modesto had two options, get arrested by police or flee into a hotel septic tank. He chose the latter. Despite police and emergency crews trying to coax him out of the sewage he refused to budge unless his mom told him to do so. Enter mom on speaker phone who told him to get the hell out of there. He complied but refused to be hosed down so police did what they had to do, instead of arresting him they handed him over to a family member who had arrived at the scene . Hmm, your stinking problem now!

Dude That’s Friggin Poop

Yeah about that sea foam. It’s friggin sewage, fool! One of Hurricane Irene reporters, Tucker Barnes, spent several minutes describing the sea foam that continued to spray over him during the hurricane tropical storm. Turns out it was a toxic mix of pollution and cyanobacteria. Basically raw sewage, which would explain why “It doesn’t taste great,”

Shit Happens

You know what I hate? When geysers of shit spew from toilets in Chanhassen. I really friggin hate that! Seems a burst water main was to blame. It sent water gushing into sewage lines, causing backups and geysers of poop to explode from toilets in 18 homes. On the bright side it was only lower level toilets which were affected so the sewage ended up mainly in people’s basements. Which is good right?

Psst I hope it was their own shit and not random people’s poop!

Want sauce with that?

Don’t Move

Ah shit!

You know what I hate? When you visit your son on Long Island for Thanksgiving and you fall neck deep into a friggin cesspool.I really hate that. Eduardo Matos (71) fell into the sewage while walking outside on the lawn.  Mr Matos  said “I was calm . . . If you panic, that shit will suck you right in,”. No shit! He was eventually rescued by his son and daughter. So much for Thanksgiving!

Falling Into Deep Shit

Take a bath man!

You pretty much know your life sucks when you go to check out your septic tank, it collapses and you fall in. Paul Paff can verify this, he fell 10ft into 3ft of shit. Doesn’t get much better than that. Not only couldn’t he climb out, there was no one around to hear his cries. For two hours he wallowed in sewage until Murphy, the neighbors dog came over for a look see. When the pooch started barking smart thinking Mr Paff started barking back. Pretty soon Murphy was riled up enough that his owner came out to investigate what all the barking was about. There she found Murphy and one very relieved neighbor. After soaking in shit for 3 hours it wasn’t surprising it took a 2 hour long bath to scrub himself clean.

Friggin Unlucky!

Geez you two, get a room!

The unluckiest man and his dog award goes to Thomas Sundberg and Rex. The two were enjoying a nice evening stroll in Kramfors, Sweden, when all of a sudden the ground gave way and Thomas and Rex found themselves submerged in a big old hole of shit. Hmm, gotta love the city’s underground dry sewage lagoon!  Hmm, once the stinky duo had climbed out of the feces, a naked Thomas and a bemused Rex sprinted to the nearby river in a vain attempt to wash off  other people’s shit ! A distraught Mr Sundberg said “it stank something fierce”. Really?