Mucus Get Well Card

I took a shot of this billboard while waiting for a train in a Sydney underground station. I’m not sure about you but I don’t think I will be sending a get well, hope your mucus clears up card to anyone, anytime soon. Just saying.

Psst Mucus is a very unattractive word!!!!

Sydney Vs Perth

Having spent a week in Sydney it occurred to me why Perth will always be the poor cousin….

Sydney has …….

Sydney Harbour Bridge, 1,149 m ( 3,770 feet )

We got …..

The Narrows Bridge which is 335m (1,099 feet)

Sydney has …

The Sydney Opera House  which cost $102 million to complete in 1973

Perth’s got ….

The friggin Perth Arena which so far has cost $548.7 million and  still isn’t finished!!!

Sydney has ….

The Sydney Tower which dominates the skyline at 309 m (1,014 ft) tall

Perth’s got …

The Bell Tower which stands 82.5 m (271 ft) and can only be seen if standing near the river.

Sydney’s got ….

The colourful Day In Day Out sculpture

We end up with …..

The same friggin sculpture in green, except we paid $1 million dollars for it!!!!!

Ice Skating On Bondi Beach Anyone?

Last thing I expected to see at Bondi was a friggin ice rink on the beach. Christmas in July!!!!

The Loon Does A Binky In Sydney

Sorry Wombies but I couldn’t help it. Belgian waffles with melted Guylian chocolate and whipped cream.

Small Break In Transmission

Just letting you know the Loon will be reporting from Sydney this week.

You Talking To Me?

Hey, psst, know where I can get me some RatSak?

Feet up Sydneysiders, there is a new rat in town and it ain’t scared of no bait traps, in fact it’s friggin immune to poison. No, I take that back, they are friggin addicted to it!!!! Yep, the super-rodents get a buzz from Ratsak. So sleep with one eye open or those ground-dwelling sewer rats and roof rats may just kick your sorry ass out of  bed.

The Pitfalls Of Facebook

Note to self, never post a big wad of cash on Facebook.  A 17 year old girl in Sydney, who was helping her granny count a big pile of cash she had stashed, decided to post a photo of it on Facebook. Enter big bad wolves. Two men, armed with a knife and a wooden club, stormed the teen’s parent’s home that very night demanding the cash. Problem? The teenager didn’t live there and neither did granny. Unfortunately, for the parents they did and had to deal with the thugs. Fail.

Psst Sheez, I hope she friggin  defriend the bastards!!!

Smile, You’re on Hidden Camera!!!

A man in a Sydney supermarket has been caught filming up women’s skirts. Hmm, see much? The camera was allegedly hidden in a shopping basket. Police seized the camera , viewed the footage and discovered 9 female crotches victims. Seems only one woman has been identified so far.The man has been charged with filming a person’s private parts without consent. Pity the fool who tries that on me….. Loon-a-eclipse !!!

Psst Do you think I went a little too far with the title???

An Appalling Act

Yesterday a fire ripped through Quakers Hill nursing home in Sydney, which was home to over 88 residents, most of which suffer from dementia. Firefighters describe it as their “worst nightmare” as they crawled through smoke filled halls rescuing the patients. What made the situation even more challenging was the fact that many of these elderly people were frail, bedridden and bewildered. The streets were lined with beds and ambulance as they ferried the survives to numerous hospitals around the area. Five people so far have died but the death toll is expected to rise as 12 are in a critical condition suffering burns and smoke inhalation. Today a 35 year old registered nurse, Roger Dean, has been charged with 4 counts of murder, after allegedly deliberately lighting the fire.

Psst A special mention should be made to the two young police officers who were the first to arrive on the scene. They rushed into the burning building without any protective clothing or breathing equipment to help rescue victims. Nearby neighbours also jumped fences and helped fire crews pull out the elderly. Take a bow, heroes.

Collar Bomb Teen Saved

OMG, you’re a year 12 student, you walk into your home only to be confronted by a balaclava wearing stranger who attacks you and places a friggin collar bomb around your neck…. America you say? Nope, friggin Australia.The girl believed to be Madeleine Pulver from a wealthy Sydney neighborhood spent a grueling 11 hours with the bomb strapped around her neck while police and the bomb squad tried to work out a way to extract her from the contraption. They even sought the help of the British military as no such device had ever been seen in Australia before. Police are baffled by the whole incident but believe it may have been an extortion attempt as a note was also found at the scene. Fortunately for the 18 year old the bomb squad were finally able to remove the device before it went kaboom.

Psst I remember a few years back watching the live Fox News telecast of the pizza delivery guy with the bomb strapped to his neck and that didn’t end so well.

2nd psst A big shout out to the NSW police for how they handled the situation.