UFO Nearly Takes Out An Airbus

If anyone knows what is yellow and blue and can fly 35,000ft, two Glasgow pilots want a word. The pilots were flying an Airbus 320 over Scotland, with 200 passengers on board, when the unidentified flying object came within meters of the plane.  The object came at them so fast they had no time to dodge the thing but luckily  it whizzed under the plane. It was a perfect sunny day and both pilots saw the object very clearly but when they radioed Glasgow Airport control tower to report the incident the tower claimed they had nothing on their radar. Hmm, yellow and blue? Sounds like the aliens are getting rather lavish with their spaceship designs in their old age.

Spooky Object in Baltic Sea

Remember the UFO shaped object discovered at the bottom of the Baltic Sea? Yeah, the one I didn’t write about because I thought it was a big load of codswallop. Well anywho, the divers who went down to inspect the mushroom shaped thingamabob that sits some 13ft above the seabed they say all their equipment stopped working when they got within 200m of it. Oh and by all their equipment I mean satellite phones and cameras. They claim when they moved away everything began working again. Spooky. Hmm, and probably why ET couldn’t phone home!!!!

It’s the Enterprise?

Alien Filmed in The Amazon

If an alien was going to plonk himself anywhere on earth where do you think he would go? Well it seems the Amazon rainforests, that’s where. Two British tourists claim they filmed an alien in the jungle and have passed the footage onto the Brazilian government. Evidently the government have now admitted that they have been monitoring alien activity in the area for some years under the name Operation Prato.

Psst Is the alien friggin bored, he just seems to be standing there doing nothing?

Tailgated By A UFO

I only wanted to ask directions!!!

You know what I hate? Being friggin tailgated by a UFO, that’s what! Some Aussie guy in the Northern Territory claims after leaving Tennant Creek a bright light suddenly appeared behind his car. He thought it was another car’s headlights but got the surprise of his life when the lights got brighter and he realized something was hovering above him. The man who only wants to be identified as Aiden said to himself “no, no, no, not me, go and take someone else, I am not interested,” The bright white/orange light followed him for about half an hour before vanishing. Hmm, well that was pretty much an anti-climax. Gosh, not so much as “take me to your leader” or an anal probe!

Psst It is quite a common occurance and the Aborgines call them ‘min min’ lights.

Dead Alien

No need to panic people but ahhhh, dead alien alert . Evidently the body, that looks suspiciously like something from X-files,  was discovered in Siberia shortly after a “pink and blue glowing object” crashed from the sky. Sheez, must have been some hell of a crash because the dude lost a limb! Many people had witnessed the crash and even emergency services went to investigate. Fake or hoax?

Alien Sighting In Siberia

We come in peace

Well, who knew? Seems air traffic controllers in Siberia were buzzed by a  UFO. Oooh and then a female sounding alien suddenly communicated with them in a gibberish cat like language. It is estimated the UFO was traveling at around 6,000 mph and 64,895 ft above sea level.What the hell were they smoking?

Want sauce with that?

UFO Over Jerusalem

No need to panic Loons, but what the hell was that glowing object flying over the Dome of the Rock in Jerusalem on Saturday? The object appeared in the sky at around 1am  and slowly descended to almost ground level before shooting upwards at lightning fast speed. Four different vids from 4 different perspectives have appeared on Youtube. Former Ministry of Defence UFO investigator Nick Pope said “We know the Israeli army has some very high-tech drones at its disposal. If this is one, it is one of the most advanced pieces of technology created by man.” Personally I think it could be Roger Ramjet. Thoughts?

Psst The Dome of The Rock is a no fly zone.

UFO Over New York

No need to panic people but WTF was that hovering over New York? Hmm, look, up in the sky, is it a plane? A UFO checking out the new mosque site? The missing secret  US space shuttle? Some friggin advertising hoax? Dear god, please don’t let it be Independence Day!!!! Witnesses said the objects, which looked like a  cluster of stars, hovered for several hours bringing New York City to a  standstill. Interestingly, the date corresponds with Stanley A. Fulham’s prediction in his new book Challenges of Change, that tentatively predicts “October 13, 2010 as the date for a massive UFO display over the world’s principal cities.” Skeptical loons? Check this out ,  New Book Predicts UFO encounter.

UPDATE : Take your tin foil hats off loons, false alarm. The UFOs are apparently birthday balloons let loose by the Westchester elementary school. Tin foiled again!

UFO Closes Chinese Airport

Look, up in the sky. It’s a bird? It’s a plane? Ah shit, it’s a friggin UFO.Xiaoshan Airport in China was closed after an unidentified flying object suddenly appeared on radar and scared the living bejeesus out of everyone. Chinese officials claim they know what it was but say they can’t tell because it’s a military secret. Hmm, OK, well that narrows the options.

Those Friggin Aliens!

Hi, just messing with ya!

OK, no need to panic but WTF, remember NASA’s Voyager 2, the unmanned probe that was blasted off into space 33 years ago? No? Well anywho, the damn thing has begun transmitting bizarre, unintelligible signals according to German UFO expert Hartwig Hausdorf. Mr Hausdorf believes aliens have hijacked the probe which is now located near the edge of the solar system. Hmm, maybe they are just sick and tired of hearing a loop of 70′s music and greetings in 55 different languages so are sending us back some of our own medicine? Oh and NASA’s spin on the thing….  it’s a glitch in the computer memory….. but we know better than to believe them, now don’t we loons!