Secret Bishop’s Business Infiltrated

An Aussie dude managed to get into a a pre-conclave meeting of cardinals at the Vatican by dressing as a bishop. Unfortunately he was busted because his cassock was too short, his crucifix a little bizarre and he wore a purple scarf instead of an Episcopal sash. Good try though.

The Butler Did It

Holy mousetrap Batman. Guess who’s behind those Vatican leaks which revealed all the alleged corruption, mismanagement and internal conflicts. ? Seems Pope Benedict’s personal butler, Paolo Gabriele . Well, that’s awkward!

Want sauce with that?

UPDATE : The butler has been arrested, but the show will go on.

Pope Not Happy About Vatileaks

Bless me Father for I have….

Holy criminal accusations Batman. The Vatican is all at Holy sea over a Vatileaks scandal that threatens to be a book. OK it’s already a book, and the Pope ain’t happy. Pope Benedict XVI has got his lawyers lined up, ready to sue as leaked documents about corruption and mismanagement within the Catholic church go public in the book His Holiness, by Italian journalist Gianluigi Nuzzi. Evidently someone on the inside has been providing private letters and memos between Pope Benedict and his personal secretary to the author (and it ain’t Murdoch). Um ah!!!

 

Anonymous Down Vatican Websites

God will punish you

Holy Heathens Batman. LulSec maybe  gone but Anonymous have still got some spunk, they have just taken down several Vatican websites because basically, they can. Oh and because they believe the Catholic church is corrupt. The hackers posted this statement on their Italian language version website “This attack is not against the Christian religion or the faithful around the world but against the corrupt Roman Apostolic Church,”

Catholics Claim Tintin

OMG, Tintin is a “Catholic Hero” . It’s true , even the Vatican’s official newspaper L’Osservatore Romano said so. OK, sure you might want to forget the racial controversy over the portrayal of “natives” in the Congo adventures but all in all it encapsulates the ideals of the church and of the scouts. Hey don’t shoot the messenger that’s what the Vatican is saying ‘Tintin is a hero of Catholicism, imbued with the ideal of the scouts,’. Seriously?

Want sauce with that?

What Letter?

Oh dear, the Vatican maybe in a spot of bother after a 1997 letter from the Vatican to  Ireland’s Catholic bishops  reared it’s ugly head, warning them not to report suspected child abuse cases to police. The letter, now in the hot little hands of the Irish broadcasters RTE, allegedly advises the Irish church not to help police in identifying pedophile priests but to let the church handle all allegations and to decide punishments in house. The letter could potentially open up a  floodgate of lawsuits worldwide against the Vatican who have long denied any involvement in sex abuse cover-ups.

Want sauce with that?

Vatican Not Happy!

Guess who’s none too happy about the “father of the test tube baby”,  Robert G. Edwards, winning a Nobel prize? Go on, guess? If you said the Vatican, take a gulp  of  communion wine. An official with the Vatican, Ignazio Carrasco de Paula, said it was “completely inappropriate” and that his work “had created a market for human eggs and created problems of embryos being frozen.”  Hmm, like the Vatican should be talking about what is inappropriate?

Who Said The Catholic Church Is A Boy’s Club?

Look away women libbers, the Vatican have just thrown the ordination of woman into the same basket as priests who rape children.As of today the Vatican sees the  “attempted ordination” of women one of the gravest crimes under church law, up there with child molestation and heresy.  Hmm and whats more, any  Catholic woman or bishop who is caught conductimg such a ceremony will be excommunicated ASAP. Bravo and welcome back to the dark ages boys.

Papal Tour Request

Oh for the love of God, it use to be the Vatican’s greatest fear was that some psycho would jump out of the crowd and try to knife the Pope during his papal tour. Hmm, not anymore. No siree, their greatest fear now is those friggin vuvuzelas. The head of the Catholic Church in England and Wales is begging the public to leave the friggin things in South Africa and not blow them during his tour of Britain. Seems Pope Benedict is not a fan!

Nun On The Run

A Dutch nun has high tailed it out of Denmark after police began probing the death of an elderly nun. It is believed in 1993 Mother Theresa Brenninkmeijer ordered an elderly nun to be locked out in the cold with inadequate clothing because she had disturbed mass. The nun died. Mother Theresa Brenninkmeijer, who reputedly had a reputation for abusing nuns at the convent in Sostrup, Denmark, is now a marked woman. Despite the death happening over 17 years ago, making it too late to prosecute her, the Danish police are/were hoping the Catholic church would assist in the investigation. Blahahaha fat chance of that! Hello, the Vatican had received numerous complaints about her abuse over the years and had done zip about it.