Oh bless, Northamptonshire police are looking for a thief who stole a Venetian blind . He should be easy to identify….he looks like this
Yep, he concealed the window blind by quietly slipping it down his jacket and into his trakky daks so as not to draw any suspicion.
Scientists clock monkeys banging rocks together and suddenly we are staring into the monkey-apocalypse. Yep, the Brazilian Capuchin monkeys have been spotted sharpening rocks to open fruit. Sleep with one eye open loons, we may be over run by spearhead wielding chimps in the future.
A waitress in South Carolina was left gobsmacked when she was left this note instead of a tip. Oh and if you were wondering, she had never served the couple before.
Just letting you know loons, if you use a vacuum cleaner to suck up petrol from your boot this is likely to happen….
Seems Wikileaks has been unplugged for the time being. Access to the infamous website has been severed leading to speculation that the US government became tired of hearing about themselves. Rumours of Julian Assange’s death have also been greatly exaggerated.
Listen and learn young loons, writing thousands of death threats and sending them to yourself is no way to go through life. A couple in Australia who worked in the health department sent themselves death threats to get indefinite time off work. While scoring paid leave they went on interstate trips and lived a carefree existence whilst their employer had the privilege of paying for it. The fake threats totalled over 80,000 and included bloodstained parcels, nasty letters and crude phone calls over a two year period. Some of the parcels contained stained children’s clothing and were sent to their kids at school. The health department even put them up in an apartment so they didn’t have to stay at their home. Unfortunately for the hubby and wife, the cops smelled a rat and came up with a sneaky plan to catch them out. They snuck into the couple’s apartment and marked a stack of letters and envelopes with a special invisible ink. Too easy. The next letter handed to police had them busted.
It took 30 years but an Argentinian soccer team have now been ordered to fix their shonky field.