Im Gonna Get Me A Pirate

Well, hello ladies!

Well, hello ladies!

Make way for the new pseudo rich, the CUPs (cashed up Pirates) are in port. Seems the hottest catch in town is a successful Somali pirate. Eligible (and I assume some that aren’t) Somali women are flocking to the port town of  Basaso in the hope of snaring themselves a rich hubby. A Somali pirate is a perfect catch, job only keeps him away a short time and he is guaranteed to bring home the bacon $US, thanks to ransom paying white dudes.My goodness, it is like an Aladdin’s cave out there. Grab your buddies, some rubber dinghies, a few high powered weapons, put on a scrowly face and find yourself a super tanker. The rest is basically negotiation, so pick a good team leader. And think girls, if you play your cards right you’ll have your very own pirate just like Keira Knightley!

24 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, You Go Girl!

24 responses to “Im Gonna Get Me A Pirate

  1. Where’d friggin Chuck Norris when you need his do-goodin’ ass?

  2. There’s my new ‘headshot’!
    That’s from a postcard dated 1908.

    Postcards and stamps, I’d like to collect again.
    I forgot to tell you about the boring mild-side of my past.

    • frigginloon

      Ahahahha postcards and stamps Sekan…there’s a hobby you don’t hear of much these days… it is a hobby right? I would hate you to do a Billy Bob on me!

  3. Ann

    Surely a sign saying ‘Croc Infested Waters’ would be enough to make you stay away …..from the top end Egads, imagine the kind of death that would be? I guess the same as being eaten by a shark. Did you know that Tony Greg the cricket commentator’s mother was taken by a shark right in front of him when he was 10 years old. How bad is that? Personally I think all crocs should be exterminated or kept at a very small number in a zoo locked up, caged and sedated. I hate the look of them. I was sure our very own Steve Irwin would one day be eaten by one, but no, a Stingray got him first. So sad.

    • frigginloon

      Ann, you are a wealth of information. I didn’t know about Tony Greg’s mother. Hmm, crocs and roaches are about the only prehistoric things that survived the catastrophes of the world. I have a feeling they are here to stay.

  4. Ann

    When I lived in Scotland Earwigs surfaced and I’d never seem one before so I thought them repulsive.. When I came to Oz all God damned things surfaced snakes, Red Backs Funnel Webs and White Tails, Crocs, sharks and desert scorpions. I’d never seen such and array of all things horrible. I think crocs are a menace and there’s no need to have so many around. We cull then we protect again. Crazy troppo
    greenies.

  5. Ann

    Hmm, I lived in Scotland for 16 years but it was never reported that anyone wass missing or eaten or been dragged under so I really think Nessie is just to get the tourists in lol. Come to think of it all the photos of Nessie are a bit grainy as well.. The panther photographer must be taking them too.

  6. jammer5

    Who’s bad mouthin’ the Norris?

    The Norris don’t wear no watch: he decides what time it is.

    Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

    Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.

    There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

    Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

    Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

    Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

    Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

    Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

    Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

    Bad mouthing Chuck Norris from down under is still not far enough away. Outer space is where it is because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris!

    What’s that got to do with the Beatles? Chuck told them to break up.

  7. jammer5

    The ONLY reason Chuck Norris hasn’t gone after the pirates is because he knows he would end up having to destroy every ship in that part of the world. And besides, his wife told him not to.

  8. frigginloon

    Ahhaahh, Jammers who knew you were a Chuck Norris fan. I am going to Wiki him and get back to you with something witty…just a minute

  9. frigginloon

    Jammers I am on to you….stuff Wiki..this isn’t your secret website is it? http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

    If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
    There is no ‘ctrl’ button on Chuck Norris’s computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
    Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
    Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
    Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s potato chip.
    Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
    Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
    Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

  10. jammer5

    Ha! You can try to google Chuck, but google knows it can’t find him: He finds google.

    Chuck Norris wrote brokeback mountain, but the script had to be rewritten. The producers were too scared to make a movie about a pile of dead ninjas in Chuck’s front yard.

    Chuck has never read a book: he stares at it until it gives him the info he needs.

    When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

  11. jammer5

    “Jammers I am on to you….stuff Wiki..this isn’t your secret website is it?”

    My advice? Hide . . . Chuck will be there in less than five minutes.

  12. frigginloon

    When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
    There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
    Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
    Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
    Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
    There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
    Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

  13. jammer5

    Chuck Norris is the reason Australia is called the land down under. It used to be the land up over, until it pissed of Chuck.

    Chuck Norris once delivered a roundhouse kick so hard, all the the guy’s family tree disappeared.

    Chuck Norris never had a toothache. No bacteria could invade Chuck’s teeth.

    If, by some strange quirk of fate, Chuck could fight himself, he would always win.

    Global warming is caused by Chuck staring at the sun until it decided it’d better get hotter.

  14. frigginloon

    OK Jammers I give up…..so remind who is this Chuck Norris again?

  15. Ann

    Jammer5 did I miss something? lol

  16. jammer5

    Chuck told me to stop.

  17. Ann

    Yeah I like Chuck , even enjoyed the movies but you need to live in your own world unless Chuck owns that too lol

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