Dumbass Bank Robber Of The Week

What has a curly wig, red lipstick, pretty dress , a fake homemade bomb made out of vegetable cans and really bad luck? Johnny Ray Bibbins. Johnny was arrested this week after attempting to rob a bank dressed like a woman. Police had no trouble identifying him, because he did pretty much the same thing 5 years earlier. Johnny had been out of jail 12 days.

Bless Southwest Airlines

Hands up who thinks the kid should go?

Imagine the horror of having a toddler who starts screaming his little heart out the moment you board a airplane? Imagine the horror of him not stopping? Imagine the shock of having the plane taxi back to the gate and escort you and your screaming kid off the aircraft? Pamela Root’s two year old son Adam began screaming “Go! Plane! Go!” and “I want Daddy!” the moment they boarded the plane heading for San Jose. As the piercing sounds resonated throughout the aircraft the flight crew made an executive decision to remove the source of the disturbance. Now Ms Root wants an apology and compo for the for the portable crib and diapers she had to buy for the extra night away from home. Small price to pay for peace and quiet!

UPDATE The Airline has apologized.

The Hazards Of Ice Skating

Ice skater Sasha Cohen having just one of those days …..

Are You Laughing At Me?

Dumb Ass!

Hmm, sure when you’re drunk you sometimes lose your sense of humor but they are only kids and it was pretty funny! Ron Martin and his companion Charlene Mallorey  got rolling drunk before jumping on a stolen ride-on lawnmower in Ocklawaha. Problem was they didn’t see the stationary bus parked right in front of them and drove straight into the back of it. The impact caused the mower to tip and unceremoniously dump both Martin and Mallorey to the gravel. Cue  laughing kids. Before the hapless duo knew it, they had a bus load  of kids making fun of them. Martin became incensed  and tried to board the bus. Enter police . Children 1, drunk ride- on lawnmower dude  6.5 with pike!

Agassi Mullet Was A Friggin Wig

I can forgive Andre Agassi for admitting he lied about his drug taking during his tennis career (just about every sports person does) but admitting the long hair he sported in the 1990’s was a wig, unfrigginforgiveable… ‘My wig was like a chain and the ridiculously long strands in three colours like an iron ball which hung on it.” Geez, I feel betrayed! End of career had that fallen off during a grand slam!

Honey, Start Dinner Without Me

I don't know, something about an index finger!

OK, word of warning to anyone who owns a Lincoln Navigator, if you happen to be pouring a fuel additive into the gas tank and a piece of paper falls in, do not and I repeat do not, try and fish it out with your index finger. Victor Harris tried and he had to wait 4 fours for the Saginaw firefighters to cut out a 4ft section of gas pipe to free him. He then had to go to the hospital where they pried his finger out of the pipe. All in all not a good day.

Death Race 2009

It's just a friggin road game officer

Ooh brilliant, a new fun road game for the whole family to play, it’s called “Russian Road Roulette” and it’s all the rage in Bulgaria. The rules are simple, all you have to do is drive through a red light at a busy intersection at high speed without hitting or crashing into a pedestrian or another car. Oh and don’t worry it is all worth it because someone who survives unscathed can receive up to $7,500 in prize money. Authorities in Bulgaria are worried at the increase in fatalities associated with the game.  Party poopers!

Bee Gone

OK, here’s the thing people, it isn’t a good idea to rid your condo of a beehive by dowsing it with hairspray then igniting it! Now dozens of people are homeless and the bees are pissed thanks to the raging fire!

Everything Stinks!

Vaibhav Bedi is suing Lynx (also known as AXE in India), not because it stinks but because he hasn’t managed to score a single women since he has used it! The loser in love is suing the company for £26,000 for the “depression and psychological damage” caused by the lack of any Lynx effect.Damn stuff made him no more attractive to women than Brut. The Axe commercials infer that when men wear their products women throw themselves at them. Obviously not for poor Bedi, he’s been using the stuff for 7 years and not a single chick. That’s some kind of epic fail and he should sue!

And Then There Were Eight

Ruled out!

OMG, just when you thought it was safe, another foot has washed up on Canada’s Pacific coast. This will make it the 8th foot in a sneaker to be found in two years. The Size 8.5 Nike runner (plus foot) was discovered on Tuesday by two men walking along the beach near Vancouver. All the feet found so far seem to have been separated from the body by a “natural process” giving no cause to believe it is foul play.Despite this, rumors persist it’s either a serial killer on the loose or the feet of long lost Airplane crash victims. Experts say the feet can stay preserved in the sea water for a long period of time.

Psst If you didn’t know about the other 7 feet, here is a recap, Feet washing up in Canada.