Spider Bites Tourist’s Penis

Stop ya bitching, I thought it was a friggin corn dog!

OK people, you might want to think twice about skinny dipping at Northland beach in New Zealand. Hmm, seems a skinny dipping Canadian tourist got bitten on his penis by a venomous katipo spider. Ewh ouch. The tourist isn’t sure when or where he got fanged but after going for a swim in the nude he fell asleep in the sand dunes and awoke to find an enormously swollen dick. No Loons, I know what you are thinking but he also suffered from a nasty red mark on his “shaft”, muscle pains, fever, headache and vomiting. The next morning he was still suffering from chest pains and heart palpitations so he got himself to hospital where he was given anti-venom. Meanwhile the spider was seen gargling with mouth wash!


Filed under Sore Loser, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, Whoops!

10 responses to “Spider Bites Tourist’s Penis

  1. The Celtic Queen

    They should have called a nursie to suck out the venom. Only in New Zuland! Why am I not suprised? lol.

  2. You’ve stumbled across my worst nightmare.

  3. Hahahahahahahahhahahahahaha! Yeah, I’m going to hell.

  4. Amy

    Who falls asleep naked in public? That’s just asking to get violated. He was just probably hoping for a 2 legged predator, not an 8 legged one, ey? (sorry couldn’t resist the trite little add on, but know that I typed it with my best Canadian accent.)

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