Happy Friggin New Year

You might just get lucky!!!

Wishing you all a Happy New Year, except for the Samoans, they had theirs friggin yesterday or something. Hmm, ask Izaakmak, he’s got the explanation and mathematical equation. Any who , party hearty but pleased don’t drink and drive, you might spill some!

Facebook Photo Fail

Ok, one more time people, do not and I repeat do not, duct tape your baby and toddler then post the pics on Facebook. That’s a defriending and arrest right there. The Arizona couple not only bound their little snowflakes by the hands and wrists they put the tape over their mouths and hung one of them upside-down on a piece of exercise equipment before taking photos and posting them. One of the Almuina’s friends then dobbed them into police. The Almunias told the cops they were just joking! Hmm, I bet the kids have a different version.

Decisions, Decisions

A man in Florida burned down his house rather than have his mother, wife and daughter move in. Those in favor say I.

That’s the Last Straw

A 99 year old Italian man has filed for divorce from his wife of 77 years after learning she had had an affair in the 1940’s. Antonio discovered the bitter truth when he went snooping through his 96 year old wife’s things just prior to Christmas.Despite the affair occurring 50 years ago Antonio is so pissed with Rosa he wants to end the marriage pronto.This will put him in the record books for the oldest person to ever get a divorce. Well ain’t love grand!

Exploding Friggin Churros

Holy exploding Churros Batman. A Chilean newspaper has been forced to pay compo of $125,000 to 13 people after they received burns after following a recipe published in their paper. Hmm, evidently the suggested temperature to make the donut like sweet meant the oil had a good chance of exploding and sending the Churros airborne…..which in some chases did!

Human Torso Found on Route 191

If you happened to have dropped a bag containing a human torso on Route 191 near Paradise Township, the Poconos police may want a word.Hmm, would make for a great country song!

Death by Flying Deer Parts

Some poor woman In Pennsylvania has been killed by flying deer parts. Yes, it’s true. She was driving along minding her own bees wax when parts of a deer flew threw her window. The deer had been struck by another vehicle when kaboom, splat.

Elephant Poo Paper

Seems there is more than one use for elephant poo. Who knew? Yep, seems you can turn the turds into paper. Lots and lots of it! It’s the brainchild of Queensland zookeeper, Tim Husband, who was desperately trying to save elephants in Indonesia from slaughter. Now locals collect piles and piles of shit to make paper to flog to tourists. One pile of dung makes 15 sheets of high quality pachyderm poo paper.

Bumcrack Bandit on the Loose

Attention loons, the bumcrack bandit is at it again. Yep, a woman wearing low slung jeans and wielding a silver gun has robbed a hotel in Queensland. Media have nicknamed her the bumcrack bandit after her butt was exposed when she jumped over the counter and was caught on CCTV.She is believed to be linked to a police shooting. If by some weird chance you can identify her ass I wouldn’t approach her …Ewh!

Loon Summer

Attention people, a small community announcement. The loon is currently at the beach frolicking in the sun. As you know that means friggin poor Internet connection. So apologizes in advanced for the sad lack of images as I am posting from iPad.No one can hear you scream in cyber space!