New Touchdown Jesus Gets Stuck At McDonald’s Drive Thru

The new 50ft “Touchdown” Jesus statue got wedged in a McDonald’s drive thru in Wapakoneta on its way to the church in Monroe. Seems the outstretched arm of Jesus came into contact with the Ronald McDonald statue and became lodged between the drive thru window and McDonaldland Playland. One of the staff told reporters “It was the loudest, craziest, most disturbing thing I have ever seen,” ….“One minute I’m typing an order into the computer, the next minute there is a thunderous noise, the building shakes, and the face of Jesus is pressed staring at me through my drive thru window. I’m going to have nightmares.”  Meanwhile the red faced driver said he was convinced he could get his truck around the tight turns to get his fries.  Authorities are yet to work out how they are going to get Jesus unstuck. Hmm, the original Touchdown Jesus was struck by lightning and now this one has been McScrewed. Kinda makes you think Jesus doesn’t like football.

Psst Friggin Ohio, the home of Bearman.

Want fries with that?


Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

12 responses to “New Touchdown Jesus Gets Stuck At McDonald’s Drive Thru

  1. Sherry

    Is this true?

  2. I wonder if we should take this as an official endorsement?

  3. A-Man

    First off, this story is completely bogus!!!
    Here is my evidence as to why this story is bogus:
    1.) This article was published on August 31st with a published date of September 1st. Make sure you know your calendar when you post something
    2.) I’ve worked at the alleged McDonalds in Wapakoneta for over 7 years and not once has there been any instance of a driver getting a piece of the Jesus stuck in the drive-thru.
    3.) The McDonald’s in Wapakoneta does NOT have a play place!!! Hasn’t for over 30 years.
    4.) The Jesus arm would have to transported by semi truck. The piece is entirely too big to be transported by any other means and this McDonald’s prohibits semis from going through the drive- thru

    Nice try authors of this article but make sure you do a little bit of research before you post something as a credible article. Very disappointed in you!!

    • Was it the arms colliding with Ronald McDonald or the staff member who was a tad too articulate that gave it away? When I couldn’t find a photo or video I thought something was McFishy. Unfortunately I was otherwise engaged yesterday to change it. Good fake story though 🙂

  4. This one is supposed to be hug it out Jesus.

  5. Karen

    This was on the local news station in Cincinnati. My husband, and others saw the report.

  6. Andrew

    Oh lord. Apparently you retards have never heard of satire.

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