Evidently Painting Your Gates At Night Naked Is Wrong

Naked gate painter told to stopI get no kick from champagne
Mere alcohol doesn’t thrill me at all
So tell me why should it be true
That I get a kick out of painting my gates in the dark , naked?

A 76 year old pensioner in Cumbria has had to plonk his name on a sex offenders register  after he got caught varnishing his back gates at night while naked. Yeah OK, he’s had 8 other convictions and admits he gets sexual gratification from being nude but he’s adamant that he doesn’t get turned on  from being seen by others. Now the poor guy isn’t allowed to appear in a public place naked or wearing less than one garment of clothing except unless he’s in need of a medical examination.


Filed under Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

5 responses to “Evidently Painting Your Gates At Night Naked Is Wrong

  1. Shhh Loon, you’ll have him imagining ways to “exhibit” himself in Emergency Rooms all over the place! Of course he might not be bright enough for that. After all, he did fail to use the “but my painter’s outfit was at the cleaners” excuse! 😆

  2. Tigertony

    Dammit Loon! Did you have to start this post with those lyrics? Now I’ve got this clip stuck in my head…

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