No, not the twigs!!!!
Oh for crying out loud, a man has been fined for assaulting the landlord of a pub with a bundle of twigs. Yes, you heard me, twigs. The landlord said “It just happened so quickly. I thought it was a weapon coming up to my face. I think he had around 10 or 12 twigs.” That’s a 400 pound fine right there.
Want sauce with that?
OMG. A woman who was dog sitting a champion Samoyed named Justin is in big doodah after she not only refused to return the pooch, but also had it neutered. 😯 Hmm, move on, nothing to lick here.
Psst There goes the stud fees.
Darwin. Calling Darwin to the front desk please. Some Dunkerklumpen in Britain got himself stuck in a traffic bollard for 2 hours. Mom must be proud.
Two families in Ontario suspect passing airplanes have been dropping crap on their properties and by crap I mean poop. The families say that their cars and driveways where splattered with petrid smelling feces which could have only come from above….. from either a plane or a “pterodactyl”. Airport authorities say samples have been analysed and it definitely ain’t their shit.
Ex-WWE wrestling star Doink the Clown, hugely popular in the 90s, was found dead today in Texas. Doink was 55.
OMG, I think I have one ….
You know what I hate? When you travel all the way to a Scottish island to see an extremely rare White-throated Needletail ( the world’s fastest flying bird) only to see it splattered by a wind turbine. I really friggin hate that. Bird watchers came from near and far ,after news quickly spread of the rare sighting (there’s been only 8 in the UK in the past 170 years) only to see it fly straight into the blade. Hmm, well I’m guessing, that’s even rarer to see.