Monthly Archives: November 2013

Iran Nuclear Deal

What could possibly go wrong?

6 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !

Cab Company 1, Robber 0

taxi 5One more time people, if you rob a cab driver you don’t, and I repeat DON’T, ring the same company back and order another cab 15 hours later because it is highly likely the man behind the wheel will be a cop.Just saying. The cab company suspected the man was the culprit because he requested to be picked up from the same address so they switched the driver with a cop.

4 Comments

Filed under Sore Loser, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Blood On The Dance Floor

wrongA clumsy reveller at a Yemen wedding has accidentally killed three guests while they we dancing to Gangnam Style. Let this be a lesson to you all, do not wave an assault rifle whilst on the tripping the light fantastic . In an attempt to fire the AK-47 into the air while busting a move he mowed down several guests. The video is currently going viral on Live Leaks.

4 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World

Cotton Ball Diet

Oh for crying out loud all you people wanting to be thin. Eating juice soaked cotton balls to make you feel full is slightly dumbass, considering it could block your instestinal tract and then kaboom! Seriously, just focus on world peace. Oh, an FYI, cotton balls aren’t made from natural fibers they contain all sorts of chemicals. Eat a shirt it is probably safer.

9 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World

Second Sex Offender Village to Open

runningGuess what? The sex offender village in Florida is expanding. Seems the first “sex offender” trailer park was such a success the owners are planning to open another one. Unfortunately, the good folk of Apopka aren’t all that keen  with one local saying he has “let them know that my firearm will reach from my property to theirs.” Hmm, there goes all the babysitting jobs.

Want sauce with that?

3 Comments

Filed under They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Chicken

A postie in England who witnessed a chicken flying the coop has left an amusing little note for the owner using a delivery card. No word on whether the chicken is still on the run.

6 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

monkey 2OMG, a pair of bungling burglars who cut themselves on broken glass while ransacking a gym came up with an ingenious idea . After having wrecked the place they returned a short time later with white paint to cover over their blood. Hmm, a nice shade of pink. But anywho, the fools had no idea their antics were being recorded on CCTV footage.

Psst Welsh

5 Comments

Filed under Friggin Dumbass, They Live Among Us !

Dead Man Walking Right Back To Jail

monkey 4Dude, faking your own death to avoid prison only works if you don’t get caught faking a prescription. Man, you were so friggin close to starting a new life in Australia, having obtaining a birth certificate from a dead child and holding out in Canada but you just had to stuff up. Travis Scott was going to the slammer for defrauding an insurance company for $11.5 million but before sentencing he faked his suicide by grinding up some of his teeth, removing pints of his own blood and pulling out clumps of his hair. He then gathered his bits , put them in a cap and then blasted them with a shotgun before leaving the cap in a canoe on a lake. The police were skeptical especially as the suicide note said he had weighed himself down in case he didn’t die from the blast. Dumbass. All his efforts has resulted in 12 years of wearing orange.

Psst Minnesota

2 Comments

Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Whoops!

Qatar’s Vagina Stadium

Oh no, the Qatar’s World Cup stadium, which was suppose to resemble the sails of a dhow boat, has been nicknamed the “vagina stadium” because, well, it doesn’t quite look like sails. Most commentators believe that now it’s been dubbed “the vagina stadium” there really is no turning back. Hmm, maybe the architects should compare notes with the architects of the “Penis church”?

qatar-stadium

penis-shaped-church

8 Comments

Filed under Whoops!

Beware The Ides of October

pigeons 3Oh crap, thanks to budget cuts , the starlings have shat all over Rome. The flock of about 1.5 million fly in around October for a little R&R. They lounge around eating olives and then in the evening they let rip, all over streets , rooftops, statues and slow moving tourists. Local authorities normally minimize the poop fest by pruning olive trees and playing loud falcon noises but this year their budgets were cut and now it has been raining poop.

8 Comments

Filed under Friggin Wildlife, Thanks For Nothing, They Live Among Us !