All It Left Was A Bad Taste

You would think this would be a sure fire way of convincing a jury you were insane but it seems the old pulling poop from your pants and eating it in front of jurors just doesn’t cut it  any more. Could it have been his deliberate holding up of the poo before shoving it in his mouth or the DAs argument that he “really,really likes meth-amphetamine” that lead to his downfall ? Whatever the California court found him guilty of armed robbery.  See ya.

A Girl’s Gotta Do, What a Girl’s Gotta Do

You wake up at 3am and are desperate for a slushie, what do you do? Hmm, well if you are 4 year old Annabella, you don on your purple raincoat, unlock the back-door and hop on a Philadelphia bus straight to the nearest shop. Fortunately the bus driver was astute enough to realise she was way too young to be out at that time of the morning and contacted police. And no, she never did get that slushie.

Great way to start a marriage

Of all the low down rotten things to do, someone is selling (on Facebook) “positive” pregnancy tests to women who want their boyfriends to propose. For $20 your deception is complete. The trick is to fake the pregnancy , get the ring on it and then fake the miscarriage.

Neighbourhood Gets High

OK, here’s the thing Indonesian police, if you decide to set fire to 3.6 tons of marijuana next to your Jakarta office make sure you notify the residents. Evidently some locals got stoned from the smoke wafting into their windows. Journalists and sticky beaks watching the bonfire were also overcome. On a high note (pun intended) , sales of chips, chocolates and sweets went through the roof.

Might Need More Public Toilets

Oh for crying out loud Hampton, Illinois , over the past 2 years there has been an increased amount of poop on the bike paths and in car parks. Oh and they don’t belong to dogs or bears. Seems people are dropping their draws and letting rip on the paths  before wiping their butts with toilet paper and leaving it on top. The problem has become so bad the council have now erected signs.

Worst Fear Realised

Seriously, it is bad enough flying without having a friggin suicidal pilot. News broke last night that the co-pilot of the ill fated GermanWings plane locked himself in the cockpit and then flew the 150 passengers and crew into the mountainside at about 350 m/h killing all on board. No words on this one, just simply horrific.

Jesus Is Back

Seems he has moved from toast to a mudslide.

 

Carpool Fail

OK, here’s the thing carpool sneak. If you are going to use a cardboard cut-out in the passenger seat make sure it isn’t of the dude from the “Most Interesting Man in the World” beer commercial…just saying. Hello, State Troopers watch TV too. That’s a $124 ticket right there.

Urban Terrorists?

Sheez renters, really? The owner of a Massachusetts house, which was about to be put on the market after renters moved out, got the shock of his life when he discovered it was wired to blow. Yep, there was a bomb ready to kaboom as soon as someone turned on one of the house’s light switches.

Please Explain

Anyone have any theories on why there would be a dead fish on a bike track ?