How to Avoid Being Eaten By a Shark

shark attackAccording to a new report playing dead when confronted by a shark is not going to save you. No shit Sherlock. Who on earth could play dead for goodness sakes? Anywho, a shark is still going to have a nip whether you play dead or not. Useless in my case because, even if I miraculously managed to pretend I was dead, I would still have to have a little  peek to see where the bugger was. Oh and if you thought splashing around like a mad man was going to scare it off, don’t bother,  evidently it attracts more sharks.

Here  is where  the loon would definitely become shark bait…..jewellery or bright swimming costumes will make you look like a big old shiny fish.

Never , ever , enter water while bleeding. Sharks are bloodhounds of the sea and can pinpoint exactly where and who .

Make sure you swim in a group, preferably right smack bang in the middle. Sharks like to pick off the lone swimmer.

My advice on how to avoid a shark attack ….. take up knitting.




Filed under Friggin Wildlife

5 responses to “How to Avoid Being Eaten By a Shark

  1. On Shark Tank a few weeks ago loon a guy invented a sonar inbuilt thing for surfboards to ward of those pesky sharks and couldn’t get a taker to invest in the idea. I couldn’t believe it!!! after all the shark deaths we’ve had too. Oh and for the overseas posters Shark Tank is a TV show here where you submit a good idea or a business venture and try to convince the Billionaires on the panel to invest in your GREAT idea.

  2. I go with Loon
    stay out of the water
    thus no shark attack

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