Escalatorville Horror

After a woman in China got eaten up by an escalator last week after she fell through the footplate, shoppers have been doing everything to avoid the same fate.

The video of the killer escalator

The video of scared shoppers

 

Has the Mystery of MH370 Finally Been Solved?

Oh for the love of Agatha Christie have they really found debris from the missing Malaysian airlines plane? Yes, a piece of plane washed up at La Reunion island, off the coast of Madagascar and all fingers are pointing to it being part of the missing MH370. The conspiracy part of me thinks it could have been conveniently planted (as it was predicted wreckage would wash up there) but the non cynical side hopes it is, so it can bring closure to all the families. Want sauce with that?

Nutellageddon

Brace yourself Australia, we are heading into a Nutellageddon. The popular hazelnut spread is about to run out and people are scared. Supermarket shelves are being stripped bare of Nutella  because Melbourne cafes and bakeries are using so much friggin hazelnut spread  in their doughnuts and desserts that there is now a shortage. AND the desperate bakers are now clearing domestic sized jars because they can’t get their little mitts on the commercial tubs. Dear lord, it is a crisis of epic proportions!!! Feeling anxious.

Beware of a Hole in One

Someone in Norway is pooping in the holes at the Stavanger golf course. And by someone the groundskeeper thinks it is a man “because the poos are too massive to be from a woman.” Hmm, no shit Sherlock. He also said the pooping had been an ongoing problem since 2005 and the pooper has some favourite holes he likes to deposit in. The club claims the pooper rides his bike to the holes during the week, not weekends. They even installed high powered spotlights to deter him but he climbed the tree and dismantled them. Oh a more brighter note the culprit is also using toilet paper.

I’m In Perth, Get Me Out of Here

One of the orang-utans at the Perth zoo attempted a great escape only to discover life wasn’t any better on the other side.

Onesie Sleeping Bag

Shoot me now… a onesie sleeping bag anyone? That’s a whole lotta grief for $129 …just saying

 

Pushing Up Daisies

Umm, no need to panic if you don’t mind getting mutant daisies for Valentine’s Day. Seems all those scary rumours about Fukashima are friggin true. The latest in a string of WTFs is a plant of deformed daisies growing about 110km from the Japanese nuclear kaboom zone.

Perth Gets All Rainbowy Over A Train Ride

This is what happens in my home town every Monday morning on the way to work. Our whole city has sing-a-longs on the public transport systems because it is the happiest place in the world. OK, not really , but some clowns thought they would give it a try. Onya Perth.

Avoid Armadillo Spit

Holy spitting armadillos Batman. Seems these hard shelled creatures have been spreading leprosy . Come on loons I can’t make this stuff up. So far there have been up  to 9 people in Florida  diagnosed with leprosy and they all have one thing in common, they have all been in contact with an armadillo. The bacteria that causes leprosy can be found in their spit. Well, that’s just nasty.

Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty

Sleep with one eye open people of Milwaukee there seems to be a lion on the loose. Since a woman filmed what looks like a lion strolling around her backyard on her cellphone, residents have been tip toeing around their neighbourhood in fear of the beast. Despite concerns by police most locals are taking to social media to pull the piss #MKELion. All fun and games until someone gets mauled. Might want to ring Mick Fanning.