Category Archives: Friggin Councils

What Happened to Nanny State?

wrongTwo sisters in Devon, England are forced each night to be locked in their rooms and to use a baby monitor to notify their mother if they need to go to the toilet. Reason? Mummy dearest married a pedophile. The council have allowed the new hubby to live under the same roof if the girls are locked up each night ( because he is still considered a risk) and he sleeps on the wall side of the bed so he has to climb over his wife (theoretically waking her)  if he tries something nasty.  Sleep with one eye open everybody. Funnily the biological daddy has a problem with this.

PSSt Not a good time for my auto corrector to keep changing locked  to licked …just saying.

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Dummy Nominated For Aberdeen Council Seat

Helena Torry has been ditched as a Aberdeen council candidate because of false submission info. Seems Helena is actually a 5 ft mannequin nominated by her buddy, Renee Slater, who is now in big trouble. The pensioner, who nominated her mannequin to fight for equality for human beings and to give a voice to the silent minority, will now face trial for submitting false information. No word from Helena, who has been confiscated.

Psst Sorry no images as I am posting from my iPad.

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Filed under Friggin Councils, Friggin Hilarious

Doggy Dumpage Disposal Unit

It makes me LOL at the lengths councils will go to confuse the crap out of people. It makes me LOL even harder at the cryptic instructions they provide. NO PEOPLE the “disposal unit” isn’t the doggy bin, it’s those neatly hidden yellow bags. Why don’t they simply write  “Grab a bag and pick up your dog’s shit and plonk it in the dog bin provided. Thank you!”  Sheez!!!! At least cats bury theirs!!!!

 

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Handicap Parking App

Park illegally in handicap parking bays do you? Hmm, well you might want to think again if you live in Austin, Texas because it won’t be long before a public vigilante group will be able to use their Smartphone to dob in handicap parking cheats. Yep, residents will soon be allowed to take a series of photos, proving a violation, and then send the images to the council via an iPhone app so they can issue a parking ticket. You should never mess with the handicap!

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Friggin Councils, Well I Never

Gingerbread Man Has Rights!

Oh %#@*!

The PC police have struck again and this time the poor victim is the Gingerbread Man. Yes, the beloved anatomically ambiguous cookie has suddenly been castrated. Menus at 400 primary schools in Lancashire now refer to the biscuit as  gingerbread “person”. The politically correct Lancashire Council have fortunately bowed to public pressure and have agreed to give the Gingerbread back his manhood after Christmas.Sheez, next thing you know the friggin redhead police will be harassing the poor cookie!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Councils, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Hey Mister, That’s Our Artwork!

Oh whoopsie, council cleaners spent a few hours washing away graffiti on pavement at Milton Keynes only to discover it was a charity street art project by teens. Awkward! The teenagers had spent 8 hours creating chalk Halloween murals and were shocked when they returned the following morning to take photos only to discover a council anti-graffiti worker busy at work washing them away. Next time maybe the organizers of The Big Draw might inform the council of their next community charity project. Epic Fail!

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Filed under Friggin Councils, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Friggin Spell Check

Oh for the love of spell check, a council in Kirklees has had to recall 7,000 of their pamphlets due to it’s friggin typos. The tourist brochure contained 50 spelling errors which included 20 misspellings of the district’s  name!!! The council are blaming the errors on an automated spell check used by the printer.

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Filed under Friggin Councils, Whoops!