When you have 6 outstanding warrants and you are handcuffed and about to be carted away by police what is the first thing you should do is? Hmm, well for an Oklahoma man it was to ask his “Momma” if it was OK to propose to his girlfriend. With his Momma’s blessing he got down on one knee and asked his girlfriend to marry him. The cop’s response…”Are you kidding me?” Unfortunately he had his hands cuffed behind his back so he couldn’t give her the ring. But the kindhearted cops recuffed him so he could at least do something right. Bless.
Attention loons, best job ever is being offered in Scotland. Hands up who wants to be a nanny? OK, there is just one catch, apart from having to look after friggin snowflakes, you have to contend with a ghost. Evidently the place is hell crazy…weird noises, furniture moving, things breaking (the usual paranormal stuff). So far 5 nannies have run for the hills. The family claim they have never experienced anything out of the ordinary. Hmm, so what are the odds they employed 5 lying, delusional child care workers? Sleep with one eye open nannies.
Attention all male loons, if you plan to go to Spain and are guilty of “manspreading” be warned. It is now an offence to spread them man legs on public transport. Just stop! Nothing worse than your personal space being invaded by a male leg.
At what stage did you think making a homemade duct tape raft would get you across the channel? A guy and his his dog were rescued by the Alaskan coast guard after the homemade contraption started taking on water.
It probably seemed like a good idea at the time. But just…. no. A female bank robber thought she could fool everyone by drawing on a fake beard during a robbery. Hmm, guess she was wrong.
PSST Might come in handy where she is going though?
When the latest Wikileaks was unleashed yesterday a certain section of the community collectively shouted “we knew it!” The info pertained to the CIA’s ability to hack into vehicle control systems in modern vehicles, which, to a conspiracy theorist , means the spy agency has the ability to perform undetectable assassinations. Enter the mysterious death of vocal US government critic and journo Michael Hastings . Hastings died in 2013 when his Merc lost control and burst into flames . Witnesses at the scene claimed car was going so fast it was causing sparks and flames before it kaboomed into a palm tree. Friends, family and colleagues have long claimed that foul play was involved. Hastings was working on an article on the excesses of Obama and CIA surveillance and spying programmes just prior to the fatal “accident” and had even sent emails to friends and colleagues warning that he was onto a “big story” and was under investigation.
The leak also reveals that the CIA have the ability to hack into iPhones and Android phones and smart TVs. Sheez, move on nothing to see at the Loon’s abode.
Oh for the love of god, what hell did you uncover? When a snake wrangler got a call about a rattlesnake in a home loo, he suspected it wasn’t the only slithering beast in the house. After removing the loo snake he went on a little hunt and uncovered 13 rattlers in their storm cellar and another 10 under the house. Feet up people , feet up. The family said they hadn’t seen a rattlesnake in years. Seems they are secretive, sneaky buggers.