Tag Archives: 91 year old

Duck 1, Old Man 0

Old man attacked by duckA 91 year old man got the fright of his life when he was attacked by an evil friggin Muscovy duck. The old guy was minding his own beeswax as he wander through a park when sqwarrrrrrk, an angry bird jumped on his back and began whacking him with his wings before sliding down and digging its talon into his calf. The man is recovering in hospital.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, That's Gotta Hurt

Zodiac Killer Is Still Alive

OK Loons, I know you have heard it all before but retired highway cop believes he knows who the Zodiac Killer is. Well it’s about friggin time someone does! The Zodiac killer haunted San Fransisco Bay area in the 1960’s, randomly killing people while dressed in a strange hood and then sending cryptic letters to newspapers and police. Lyndon Lafferty believes the killer is a 91 year old man still living in California. What’s even worse is he believes that the Zodiac  had been protected by corrupt officials and police because the Zodiac’s wife was having an affair with a prominent judge. And what’s even worse still, he’s written a book on it  without revealing his identity . Seriously people, shouldn’t your main aim be to have the bastard arrested instead of making money from writing books?

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never

I See Dead People

Now who am I going to play cards with?

Living with a corpse seems to be more popular than I thought. The latest “can’t live without them” case involves a 91 year old widow from the US who not only was found living with her dead embalmed hubby but also her dead embalmed twin sister. Jean Stevens had both bodies dug up and placed in her home . Her husband’s corpse  had been living with her for 10 years while her sister was a recent addition. Hubby was on a couch in the detached gargage and sis was dressed in her favorite housecoat on the couch in  spare room. She would chat with them and do their hair just like they were still alive. If it wasn’t for a rotten stinking, relative who dobbed her into police she would still be enjoying their company.

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Filed under Friggin Gross, Friggin Wrong, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Don’t Mess With Florence Critelli

Damn punks!

All hail Florence Critelli who is 91  and still works as a New York pharmacy cashier on Long Island. This week however, she got more than she bargained for when some scumbag punched her as he tried to steal money from her cash register. Ms Critelli said “He hit me good.”  Despite getting punched in the chest and knocked to the ground she refused medical attention and went back to work to finish her shift. After finishing for the day she got in her car and drove home. Ms Critelli says she can’t wait for the police to nab the thief so she can “smack him” back. Don’t you worry, I am sure there will be a line of people willing to do that for you.

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, You Go Girl!