Tag Archives: ambulance

It Was An Emergency

ambulance-2A woman who missed the last bus for the night wasn’t going to be left stranded. No friggin way. She jumped into an ambulance, that had been left running outside a hospital while the driver attended a patient, and took off. Of course she didn’t get far, of course she had a suspended driver license, of course she was from Ohio (home of  friggin Bearman).


Filed under Friggin Ohio Home of Bearman

Ambulance Fail

Attention Londoners, when you ring the ambulance and say there is a “bird collapsed” can you be more specific? Because apparently, when the paramedics arrived at the scene and raced to the group of people gathered around the collapsed bird , they discovered it was a sick pigeon not a woman. The dispatcher had rightly assumed when the caller said “bird” he was using the slang for woman because an ambulance service is for humans, people!!!!


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!

Impatience Is The New Black

Yeah, OK, sure, a vehicle was blocking your car but did you really have to hop into it , start the engine and attempt to move it? Hello Warren Melamed, didn’t you notice it was a friggin ambulance and they were actually loading a patient into it at the time? He later told police he was mad because the ambulance had blocked him in. Boo friggin hoo. Oh yeah, it was in Tennessee.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

As I Lay Sleeping

The last thing you would expect as you lay unconscious and strapped to a stretcher in the back of an ambulance is to be raped by a paramedic right? Well that is what allegedly happened to a woman on Christmas Day after she fell over at a party and suffered a concussion. During the ride to the Yale-New Haven Hospital she came to and found a man on top of her but she couldn’t move because she was strapped down. The 49 year old paramedic was the only one other than the 22 year old woman in the back of the ambulance at the time and he has been placed on administrative leave until lab results and interviews have been completed.

Psst If the allegations are true I wonder how many times he has done it before?


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World

Five Year Old In Cardiac Arrest Turns Out To Be a Friggin Cat!

OK people, one more time, 000, 999 and 911 are for “human” emergencies ONLY. British ambulance officers were stunned when they raced to an emergency call to save a “five year old” in cardiac arrest, only to discover the patient was a friggin cat. OK, sure, a much loved cat, but a friggin cat. The dispatcher received the call from a distressed couple who were begging for someone to revive their 5 year old. Not only was an ambulance called but also a rapid reponse car. When they arrived they found the couple in tears cradling their moggy (which later died). One of the paramedics was heard muttering “I’ve gone to some silly calls but nothing like this. I can’t understand why they didn’t try to call a vet.”


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Sore Loser, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Business Is Business

Never stand between a China man and a restaurant bill. A customer,  who had a seizure at the Shifu Dumpling Express in Acland St, St Kilda,  and his friend were handed the bill as the ill man was being loaded into an ambulance. Hello, someone had to foot the bill! In response the owner said “My opinion is that they ate in our restaurant, they have to pay”. Hmm, evidently the bill wasn’t even $30.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

JFK Ambulance Auction

Sheez, if you missed out on the Lee Harvey Oswald coffin auction last month, don’t fret, this month you can try your luck bidding for the ambulance that carried JFK’s body from Andrews Air Force Base to Bethesda Naval Hospital in Maryland after he was assassinated in Dallas. Yes, it’s the one and the same 1963 Pontiac Bonneville ambulance folks and it’s up for auction in Arizona. The ambulance also transported Jackie O, Bobby Kennedy and JFK’s coffin to the US Capitol Building, so you’ll have a lot of talking points.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Man Takes Ambulance on Joyride

OK drunk man, next time you decided to steal an ambulance from the Wisconsin ski area can you make sure it doesn’t include a patient and paramedics. The incident happened when an ambulance was called to  tend an injured skier at the Tyrol Basin Ski and Snowboard Area. While treating the patient  in the back of the vehicle an Illinois man jumped in the drivers seat and began driving it around the parking lot with the emergency brake still on. No word on how they got him to stop.

Psst Well at least he didn’t put the siren on!

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!