Tag Archives: attacks
You know what I hate? When a grey short-hair cat sneaks on board a train in New Zealand and goes Chuck Norris all over the driver. I really friggin hate that. The kitty allegedly snuck on at the Wairarapa station and when was confronted by the driver scratched him so badly he required bandages. The train was delayed by 30 minutes while they found a braver assed driver. No word on whether the cat will be charged the usual $18 fare.
Tiger, a 19 year old moggy who sleeps 20 hours a day, dribbles when he sleeps and snores like a trooper is responsible for scaring the crap out of Leeds posties. Oh yeah, the postmen are so friggin scared of the kitty cat they are refusing to delivery mail to the owner Tracy Brayshaw. The posties claim the cat attacks them as they approach the cat flap and then chase them down the garden path. Now Ms Brayshaw has to collect her mail from the local sorting office. Nanny State, Nanny State, Nanny State.
Oh for crying out loud people, can you please keep your friggin pet snakes locked up thank you very much. An Ontario man was minding his own beeswax, working on his computer, when a friggin three foot California king snake appeared from out of nowhere and bit him on the hand while he was typing! Unbeknown to the man, his neighbor’s pet snake had managed to slither it’s way into the man’s apartment by either going through a water pipe or a heating vent. After the man said a few WTFs he flung it on the floor and then captured it in a garbage bin before high tailing it to the nearest hospital. The poor guy had no idea it was not venomous. Sadly the poor snake had to be euthanized due to it’s injuries. Hmm, I am gathering he did more than just fling it on the floor?
Psst Are you sure it was a pet snake and not just one very lost and angry one?
What’s up with the friggin wildlife today? Geez! The latest animal saga comes curtesy of a friggin water rat who attacked a woman while she lay in bed in her motor home in New Zealand. So much for her hubby, the dog and her three legged cat! Lynne Henderson was in bed with husband Neil, when she remembers reaching out to pat her pussy which had just jumped up for a cuddle. Hmm the only thing was, it wasn’t her cat. As she went to stroke the startled rodent it latched onto her upper lip.If it wasn’t for her screaming and her hubby’s fast thinking (he turned on the light) the big friggin water rat could still be on her face. Neil said “It was about nine inches long, very round and cuddly … well, violent, actually,”.(Geez, I hope he is referring to the rat!!!).
OK and the drama didn’t just stop there, hell no. After the rat had the living bejeezus scared out of him, he fled to the bathroom while Neil scurried off to borrow an air rifle. When he return the rodent was “bouncing off the walls and ripped the toilet holder clean off”. Eventually Neil built up enough courage to open the bathroom door and confront the pissed off rat. After giving him a nudge from behind the loo the rodent copped a shot to the tummy before fleeing out the door and up a tree. The Hendersons 1, big huge water rat 0.
Psst The dog and the three legged cat did nothing!