A man from Cleveland has been banned from going near any garage pumps after he was caught drinking petrol …again. The addict loves nothing better than slashing the hose and taking a drink or sniff of gasoline before doing a little jig while high as a kite. A few years back he tried beating the habit by attending meetings but was kicked out due to the stench and the fear he posed a fire risk.
Tag Archives: banned
A word of warning to any British man intending to play darts in a competition in Somerset. Forget it if you have long hair, a beard and look like Jesus .Seems it is rather distracting especially when the crowd begins to chant “Jesus, Jesus”. The poor guy was blocked from the event by two security guards before he could even get through the door. Last year he was ejected after the crowd got overly enthusiastic with the Jesus chanting and put the other players off.
Look away Fraz, Binky, Winky and Twink, San Diego city officials have cancelled the annual 4th of July marshmallow fight. OMG, NOOOOOOOO. Oh and get this, their reasons are to a) prevent littering and b) prevent the use of harmful objects.Bwahahaha, since when has a marshmallow been deemed a harmful object, now running with the bulls, yes, but mallows, no. This is rich coming from a country that is allowed to carry concealed weapons. Hmm, unless they use marshmallow bullets…that could hurt? Bwahahaha no it couldn’t. Anywho, local businesses have been told to quit selling marshmallows. It’s cruel I say, cruel. How about a Gummy Bear fight instead?
A Kiwi commercial with kids talking about their dad’s drug driving habits has been banned. It’s friggin hilarious …
Hands up who knew that since 1934 the sale of condoms have been banned in St. Louis? Hmm, me neither but it would explain the high rates of sexually transmitted diseases and teen pregnancies….just saying. Anywho, the city is working on overturning the stupid law. As you were….
A word of warning to anyone contemplating masturbating in libraries. A man from Wisconsin has been banned from “all the libraries on the face of the earth.”after he slapped his sausage one too many times in a public library. The ban is part of his bond. Sheez, doesn’t he know you can go blind?