Tag Archives: baseball bat

Are You Awake?

OK, here’s the thing roomie, you wake me, I WILL club you senseless with my bat, OK? The victim had popped home to pick up a few things for a sleepover at a friend’s place when he and his mates woke up his roomie (who happens to also be his nephew). Nephew goes ballistic and starts whacking his uncle with a baseball bat leaving him with a fractured skull and severe swelling on his brain. Hmm, that’s going to make Christmas get togethers a bit awkward.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, That's Gotta Hurt

Strike One!

Shut the hell up!!!!

Sandra Maloney (70) breathed a sigh of relief this week after she was found not guilty of beating a peacock to death with a baseball bat outside her condo in Hawaii. You see the damn thing had been keeping her awake every night with its incessant friggin squawking that in the end she just “lost it” . After killing the damn thing she had planned on eating it. The defence argued that peacocks in Hawaii were a friggin “invasive species” and needed to be controlled.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Clockwork Apple

On the day Apple released the iPad, Justin Kockott and his mates from Pittsburgh filmed themselves smashing one with a baseball bat outside a Best Buy store and then posted it on Youtube. When quizzed about why he did it Kockott said “It was just something to do”. Ugh, the new generation of wildebeests! What are we up to, generation Z?

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

Third Strike You’re Out!

Strike 3!

Bless, a Pennsylvanian woman who hit her 25 year old son with a Louisville Slugger  said “I brought him into this world and I’ll take him out of this world.” Linda Newstrom came home drunk on Valentine’s Day and one thing lead to another and she ending up booting her son out of the house. As he was packing she came at him with a baseball bat, connecting on the third strike. Foul ball!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Sore Loser, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Those People of Walmart

Not really news but friggin funny all the same. A man in Lilburn, Georgia walked into a Walmart , slaunted over to the sporting goods section, pick himself out a metal baseball bat, then toddled over to the electronics department where he smashed 29 flat screen TVs. Ta-da! Now if he only had fart spray his routine would have been complete!

Psst I guess they’ll be having a TV sale!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!