Tag Archives: bed

One Man’s Junk Is A Country’s National Treasure

Henry VIIISomeone is going to be really pissed when they realise the old wooden bed they dumped in a hotel car park in Chester is worth about 20 million pounds and is now one of the most valuable pieces of furniture in British history. The bed, which was recently sold at auction for £2,200, belonged to none other than Henry VII and Elizabeth of York. Haven’t got a clue who they were? They were Henry VIII’s parents, which means it is highly likely the serial widower and Catholic church meddler was conceived in it.

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Filed under Sore Loser, Well I Never

Move Over You’re Hogging The Blankets

Man discovers fox sleeping with him in bedA man in London thought his girlfriend was getting a little frisky in bed when she started to nuzzle the back of his neck so he rolled over to give her a cuddle only to come face to face with a fox. No loons, the chicken killing kind. Evidently the vixen had slipped through the cat door and jumped into the warm bed with him.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife

The Dangers of Bed Bouncing

OK Loons, the moral of this story is, never,ever hide a gun between two mattresses if you have a 5 year old in the house because if she happens to bounce on the bed….. KABOOM…. a bullet right through her ankle.

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Filed under That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Not Tonight Honey!

You know what I hate? When you are on hols and you accidentally enter the wrong hotel room and climb semi naked into bed with a Spanish couple. I really friggin hate that! ? Hmm, so too does the woman who woke up to find Gary Oddie lying on top of her. She screamed, her boyfriend woke up and Mr Oddie (who was apparently drunk) refused to leave. Mr Oddie now has free accommodation at the local jail and a great travel story!

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

Haunted Mattress

boo!

Calling all exorcists, all exorcists to Infirmary Walk please. Kevin Cartwright (56) who lives on Infirmary Walk in  Worcester is looking for an exorcist to get rid of the friggin spirits messing with his bed. The dude needs some sleep. Since returning from overseas last September his bed has been possessed. Evidently the mattress moves “like someone or something” is in it. Mr Cartwright even got 8 friends to sleep in his bed (not at the same time…gosh!) and 4 of them agreed something was friggin moving it. Three people, who claim to be in touch with the spirit world, came a calling and they told Mr Cartwright the little spooks are child spirits messing with him. Little shits! Hmm, interestingly he lives next to an old school building that recently had renovations done.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never