Tag Archives: bites

Bad Mannered Raccoon

I swear the cat was behind this …

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Snakes Alive

cobra 2You know what I hate? When you chop the head off a cobra to make soup and about half an hour later when you are taking the garbage out the bodiless snake bites you and you die. I really friggin hate that! A chef in China died after the head of a snake bit him while he was  carrying it out in the rubbish.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Man vs Wild

Boo!

OK loons, if I was bitten by a cobra I’d lay down and die (after I freaked a little) but not Mohamed Salmo Miya. The Nepalese farmer was so annoyed at the snake for biting him while he was working in the field, he chased it and then bit it to death. Miya told reporters ‘I could have killed it with a stick but I was mad with anger and wanted to take revenge. I killed it with my teeth.’  Hmm, might be some anger management issues there.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, That's Gotta Hurt

Lions, and Tigers, and Snakes! Oh, my!

Whats for dinner?

Egads, a Kansas cop is one brave friggin dude after he pried a woman from the jaws of a 8ft (2.4m) pet python. Chrystal Wilson had just let her albino snake out of its cage for a feeding when it decided she was good enough to eat and clasped its jaws  on the side of her neck. Terrific! A child in the house quickly rang police and officer Max Bryant came to the rescue. He grabbed the python’s nose and jaw and prised its mouth open before the snake went in for the killing crush . Dude you deserve a medal. Oh wait, you have been nominated for a bravery award. Well done. As for Ms Wilson, she has been fined for harboring the animal. Might want to sleep with one eye open!!!!

2 Comments

Filed under Friggin Scary, Friggin Wildlife, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Kung Fu Panda

It looked like an enormous piece of bamboo. My Bad?

How friggin slow would you have to be to get bitten by a panda? I mean, hello? Don’t they just sit there on their lazy assed behinds chomping on bamboo for goodness sakes? Hmm, evidently not. Health and safety are friggin freaking after a panda, yes you heard me, a panda, bite and clawed at a zookeepers leg at a California zoo. Bai Yun, the bitch, attacked the keeper after she wandered out of her pad when someone forgot to secure the safety barrier.

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, That's Gotta Hurt

Model 0, Snake 0

OMG, remember the Israeli model Orit Fox who got bitten on her enormous boob by a snake? Come on, you remember the footage? Well anywho, the snake has died of silicone poisoning. No, it’s true. RIP.

 

8 Comments

Filed under End Credit, Friggin Wildlife, Well I Never

Snake 1, Boob 0

It saw an opportunity and took it ….

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Filed under Friggin Wildlife, That's Gotta Hurt