Bomb Fail

Run for your lives it’s a….. A distraught elderly German man rang the cops fearing he had unearthed an unexploded WWII bomb in his backyard. When the police rushed to his house they carefully approached the 40cm long object only to dicover it was a zucchini. Seems a neighbour chucked it over the fence.

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

OMG whoopsie, a Syrian rebel blew himself and his fellow freedom fighters to kingdom come, when he took a selfie with a phone connected to a bomb. Awks.

Royal Flush or just Craps

A German casino (and several streets) was evacuated after reports a rubbish bin in the men’s loo was making suspicious ticking and buzzing noises. A bomb squad unit was deployed and several streets surrounding the casino were also evacuated for fear of a kaboom! The whole incident was called off when the special unit discovered the sus device was not a bomb but  …wait for it…. a discarded mechanical penis ring that had its vibration function turned on. Move on, nothing to see here.

Could have been messy

Hey kids, you do know that the barnacle covered buoy you are playing with and jumping on at the beach is actually a World War II bomb right? Awks. The young kids found the bomb on a Welsh beach and asked their mum if they could play with it. Turns out it was a live bomb. Enter the Royal Navy who kaboomed it.

Urban Terrorists?

Sheez renters, really? The owner of a Massachusetts house, which was about to be put on the market after renters moved out, got the shock of his life when he discovered it was wired to blow. Yep, there was a bomb ready to kaboom as soon as someone turned on one of the house’s light switches.

It’ll Be Right Mate

Don’t you love Australia? When a car was discovered in a car park with a suspicious flammable package in the back seat “An exclusion zone of 10m” was established around the vehicle. Blahahahhaaha, 10m? Good luck if that kabooms.

“Bomb” Will Get You In Trouble Every Time

A man was not allowed to board a plane from the US to Puerto Rico because he kept repeating the word “bomb”. Steady on loons, the man has Tourette Syndrome and when he gets nervous he sometimes says  things he’s trying to suppress, like all the Boston bombing mayhem. His friends had notified the airline and TSA about his condition prior but obviously they didn’t take it into consideration. Sheez , he could have sat next to me, I wouldn’t have cared , I’m more worried about the plane crashing.

Deadly Squid

No need to panic just quite yet, but a live bomb was found inside a squid caught off the coast of China. The 3lb explosive narrowly missed kabooming at a fish market when the squid was cut open. Local police suspect the rusty bomb had fallen into the ocean from a fighter jet. Hmm, sounds suspiciously like a Kim Jong Un suicide squid squad to me.

Want sauce with that?

Run, It’s About To Blow

A street in California was evacuated after a suspicious object was found in a resident’s mailbox. The bomb squad were called in and tehnicians spent 2 hours examining it before they concluded it was a breast pump. As you were.

Get a Job

Sometimes it is just easier to rob a bank. A female bank employee was taken hostage by some dude at her home in Phoenix and held overnight. The next day he drove her to the Bank of America , placed a friggin device around her neck and told her to get him money. The cops were alerted , he fled and the bomb squad rocked up and removed the device from around her neck, which turned out to be a fake bomb.