Tag Archives: bomb

Whatever You Do, Don’t Smoke!

Yeah, about those 6 supposed terrorists on a bus in England with a bomb in their bag, turns out it was an electronic cigarette. Awkward. Seems a highly paranoid attentive passenger called the cops from the bus after seeing smoke coming from a bag. Enter police, bomb disposal units, ambulances, fire engines and the military. After the passengers were forced to sit on the bus for three hours they were eventually marched off and held for another few hours while bags were searched. Hmm, that’s when they found the electronic cigarette which is used to aid smokers to quit. Sheez, enough to make you want to start smoking again, I say.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, How Embarrassing, Well I Never

Attention People, Does There Happened To Be A Pilot Onboard?

You know what I hate? When some crazed passenger goes running up and down the aisle of a JetBlue plane screaming “bomb” and “al Qaeda” and you discover it’s the friggin pilot. I really hate that! The co-pilot, god bless him, locked him out of the cockpit leaving the 135 passengers and 5 crew to deal with the psycho. While some whipped out their iphones to record the meltdown, others tried to restrain him, Meanwhile an off duty pilot assisted the co-pilot in landing the plane in Amarillo.

OMG, want to see the pilot being removed from the plane? Hannibal lector didn’t have it so rough!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Mother’s Day Could Be Tricky!!!

OK here’s the thing kiddo, when getting into a domestic with your bro don’t be throwing a molotov cocktail at your mom,  because that is an arresting and a million dollar bond right there. Just saying.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Bomb Squad At Rush Limbaugh’s Home

The bomb squad were called to Rush Limbaugh’s Palm Beach home today after a sus package was discovered with “electronic plaque and wires”. The police have already traced the sender, who is from Pennsylvania. They claim there was nothing that could go kaboom! Move on, nothing to see here.

Psst Who would want to blow up Rush?

 

 

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Filed under Whoops!

As American As Apple Pies

Yeah, about that Sacramento bank robber who claimed to be carrying a bomb in a fast food bag, it was actually a pair of McDonald’s apple pies. Step away, nothing to see here. Daniel Hegwood used the art of deceit when he walked into a Wells Fargo bank with his paper bag and told the teller he had a bomb. Shame he didn’t use the art of moving like a jack rabbit when he left with the cash because he got caught nearby.

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Filed under How Embarrassing, Well I Never

Bomb Scare At Detroit McDonalds

McDonald’s patrons were forced to leave their Big Macs and fries and exit stage left after a suspicious looking bottle with wires protruding from it was found in the bathroom of a Detroit store. Staff evacuated everyone fearing it was a bomb and called the cops. The bomb squad was later seen exiting the building with a brown paper bag (Hmm, Maccas to go?). No word on what the suspicious looking object was but I’m guessing it was a bong !

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never

Police Arrest New York Bombing Suspect

Hmm, I guess we will be hearing the name Jose Pimentel a lot more less in the coming months, years, decades after he was was charged with conspiring to commit an act of terrorism in New York yesterday. The dude was planning to pipe bomb police and post offices in New York City with his homemade devices made from ingredients bought at Home Depot hardware stores. The nutter has been on the NYPD watch list since 2009 but it was only after the death of radical cleric Anwar al-Awlaki early this year that real concerns grew.  Pimentel was planning to change his name to Osama Hussein in honor of his two heroes, Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein. Hmm, like that wouldn’t make him stick out like a sore thumb! I hope he likes orange!

Psst Hmm, why the hell did he want to bomb friggin post offices, they’re full of postal workers?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never

Exploding Toothbrush Recall

Um, attention all people with a Colgate-Palmolive Motion Electric Toothbrush, you might want to step away from the device as  it just might go off like a bomb. So far there have been nine reports of these particular toothbrushes exploding. Health Canada have announced a complete recall of the battery operated death trap despite there have been no recorded serious injuries yet .

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Nutter Alert

A man has flipped out in  a NSW Family Law court and is now holding his daughter hostage claiming he has a bomb in his backpack. The drama unfolded early this morning when he rocked up at the Paramatta court with his 11 year old daughter in tow . He stormed into a female clerks office and asked for a man she had never heard of.  He left and returned a few minutes later telling her he had a bomb in his backpack. The female clerk, Betty Hor, told media “Its my unlucky day,”  The man, chucked a small hissy fit before going  up to the next floor with his poor daughter. He then plonked  a judge’s wig on his head, smashed a window and threw a phone out. Negotiations are still in full swing as the police try to work out what the hell has upset him. A custody battle has been ruled out. The area remains in lock down.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, They Live Among Us !

Collar Bomb Teen Saved

OMG, you’re a year 12 student, you walk into your home only to be confronted by a balaclava wearing stranger who attacks you and places a friggin collar bomb around your neck…. America you say? Nope, friggin Australia.The girl believed to be Madeleine Pulver from a wealthy Sydney neighborhood spent a grueling 11 hours with the bomb strapped around her neck while police and the bomb squad tried to work out a way to extract her from the contraption. They even sought the help of the British military as no such device had ever been seen in Australia before. Police are baffled by the whole incident but believe it may have been an extortion attempt as a note was also found at the scene. Fortunately for the 18 year old the bomb squad were finally able to remove the device before it went kaboom.

Psst I remember a few years back watching the live Fox News telecast of the pizza delivery guy with the bomb strapped to his neck and that didn’t end so well.

2nd psst A big shout out to the NSW police for how they handled the situation.

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never