You know what I hate? When you toddle off to plant a bomb and the damn thing blows up your face before you get to your destination. I really friggin hate that! Wannabe terrorist and self described anarchist Luciano Pitronello Schuffeneger from Chile now has no hands, no eyesight and third degree burns over his entire body after attempting to plant a bomb at a local bank. Police believe he may have accidentally set off the timer as he tried to get into the building. Hmmm, won’t be doing that again!
Psst There is video of the incident on Youtube but it’s far too disturbing to show.
Talk about a big bang theory, someone planted small explosives in several IKEA alarm clocks in Belgium, Netherlands and French stores AND they all went kaboom simultaneously. The booby trapped alarm clocks had small firework type devices inside them and they all went off during opening time, scaring the crap out of customers and staff. Sheez, that would be right, they’d have to blow up the only friggin thing that you don’t have to friggin assemble!
Who the hell would attempt to blow up Gloria Allred? Hmm, now lets see, there’s …… Seems some clown sent a suspicious package addressed to the mega lawyer but it turned out to be just a water bottle. Anywho, all I can say is you better run fool.
Psst Gloria Allred is an American lawyer who takes on high profile cases and is kinda scary. You might remember her as the lawyer of Joslyn James, the hard done by porn star lover of Tiger Woods.
Want sauce with that?
A woman in the Philippines died instantly after her Christmas present exploded. Sheez, the damn pressie contained a friggin bomb. The poor thing was killed on the spot when it kaboomed right in her face as she opened it. Who would do something like that? The present was sent to the family home in Manila.
Oh well, back to the drawing board!
Nice one Edward Callahan. Callahan, a New York homeless guy, decided to try his luck robbing a bank with an old TV remote control. Damn thing nearly worked too, especially after he told the teller it was hooked up to a bomb. Everybody panic. Terrified employees of the Chase Bank went scurrying up to the roof fearing a kaboom, while a trembling Callahan got his bag of money. Doh, unfortunately poor old Callahan only got a short distance out of the bank before having a seizure. Oh well, on the bright side, he won’t be homeless anymore!