Tag Archives: British woman

Are You friggin Insane?

A 56 year old woman has been arrested in Bali for allegedly attempting to smuggle in 4.7kg of cocaine which has a street value of £1.6m !!!  The drugs were allegedly found hidden in the lining of Lindsay Sandiford’s suitcase after arriving in Indonesia from Bangkok. If  found guilty, sadly that is the death penalty…… by firing squad.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary, Thanks For Nothing

Awkward Sex Mishap In Spanish Hotel

Oh for crying out lady. A 49 year old British woman who was having sex in the stairwell of a Spanish hotel was left dangling naked from two bars after she accidentally tumbled over a handrail. The woman, who hasn’t been named, was having sex with her hubby when she flipped over the handrail and plummeted several feet into darkness. But in some friggin act of god, her ankle got caught in the bars of the railing and she just missed crashing to the marble floor. Unfortunatately she had to endure not only a broken ankle but the embarrassment of hanging upside down naked while waiting for firemen  to force part the railings to free her.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!

Granny Gets a Do Not Resuscitate Tattoo

British granny Joy Tomkins (81) is so friggin adamant she doesn’t want to be brought back to life if she gets in a medical emergency she has had the words “Do Not Resuscitate” tattooed on her chest. Oh and if she rocks up face down, she has had another tattoo put on her should which reads “PTO” (please turn over). Can’t be too careful. Ooh and the best part it only cost her 5 pounds for the tatt.

Psst Despite all of Joy’s pre-planning , medical officials say the tattoo isn’t legally binding.

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, You Go Girl!

Madeleine McCann Sighting In India

Indian police have taken a DNA swab from a little girl who bears a striking resemblance to Madeleine McCann, the girl who went missing in Portugal in 2007 while on holidays with her family. The sighting was made by a British woman and two Americans in the city of Leh. Police have confiscated the passports of both the French mother and Belgian father until the results of the tests are in. Wouldn’t that make “movie” of the week?

UPDATE : Ah, forget about it, kid’s not her. Whack on those deerstalkers again loons!

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!, Well I Never

Hero Or Villian?

A job center official is in trouble after he told a 23 year old British woman with 30 tattoos and 20 body piercings that if she wanted a job she might consider putting “a paper bag over your face”. Come on people, that was solid advice!

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never, Whoops!