How Would You Like It?

Things are definitely bigger in Texas . A Texan company was forced to recall its coffee after complaints it was giving men erections. Complaints? Seems the coffee contained desmethyl carbodenafil which has a similar effect as Viagra.

Hating It!

We interrupt this broadcast to bring you an important message. McDonald’s have finally conceded their Mccoffee tastes like Mcshit. Thank you.

Want fries with that?

Coffee Break

Great, another thing to worry about when flying. A United Airlines flight had to be diverted to Toronto after the pilot accidentally spilled coffee all over the friggin control panel. Not only did it make one hell of a mess it also sent the navigation and communication system into a complete meltdown, sending out friggin  distress signals including the big one….7500… a hijacking!!!!  Sheez, lucky the clumsy pilot was able convince airport authorities it was all just one big misunderstanding.

Starbucks Meltdown

I don’t know loons, me thinks this dude should step away from the coffee, he’s got all the adrenalin rush he needs…

Mocha!

If you are going to make your coffee naked in the small wee hours of the morning in Springfield, Virginia make sure your curtains are closed otherwise you might get yourself slapped with an indecent exposure charge and face a year in jail. A woman and 7 year old boy, who happened to be walking outside Eric Williamson’s house at the same time he was making his brew starkers, we so horrified at what they saw they called police. Bippity, boppity boo, he was taken away in handcuffs. Geez, at least it wasn’t a long black!

Psst Isn’t that where the Simpsons live? That woman didn’t happen to have blue hair? Doh!

Stiff Penalties

What Bob doesn't realize is he will be erect for days!

Now boys  if you drink Malaysian coffee you are pretty much guaranteed to be up for hours and hours. Authorities have confiscated 900 boxes of coffee laced with Viagra.Oh yeah, nothing like Viagra in your coffee to get you up in the morning! Though Viagra is legal in Malaysia it still requires a prescription. The company, which was raided by Kuala Lumpur health ministry officials, was believed to be selling the coffee and Viagra concoction as an energy booster.

Psst I heard if  it is successful, they were going to rename all the Malaysian Starbucks, Star…. ah never mind!