Tag Archives: court

All It Left Was A Bad Taste

pooYou would think this would be a sure fire way of convincing a jury you were insane but it seems the old pulling poop from your pants and eating it in front of jurors just doesn’t cut it  any more. Could it have been his deliberate holding up of the poo before shoving it in his mouth or the DAs argument that he “really,really likes meth-amphetamine” that lead to his downfall ? Whatever the California court found him guilty of armed robbery.  See ya.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross

Penchant for Pot NOT a Disability

court says penchant for pot not a disabilityOh for crying out loud mister, you can not, and I repeat can not, use the excuse that your penchant for pot is a disability as a reason to be reinstated after you got fired from your Ottawa City job for buying marijuana while in your work car . The dude took Ottawa City to court claiming they were “obliged to accommodate him under the Ontario Human Rights Code because his penchant for pot qualified as a disability.” The court basically said yeah, NO. Hmm, his resume is going to suck now.

Psst The doctor assigned to assessed the guy said his claims of having a disability were based on “self-diagnoses”.


Filed under Friggin Hilarious, They Live Among Us !

For Whom The Bell Tolls

You’ll have to speak up

The hills will not longer be alive with the sound of cowbells in one Austrian village. Seems not everyone enjoys the clang, clang, clang, they make, especially during the night. A court has ordered a farmer to remove the “traditional” bells from his herd after a neighbor complained.

Psst Hmm, I’m guessing the cows are friggin pleased too!!!




Filed under Friggin Wildlife

You Shouldn’t Judge Me

A female judge, who felt sorry for a homeless car thief who had missed a court appearance and had failed to follow his probation conditions, let him off with just some harsh words rather than a jail sentence. Hmm, so as a thank you, he promptly left the courthouse and broke into her car.


Filed under Sore Loser, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never, Whoops!

Fergie Faces Jail Time

Fergie (Duchess of York) is in big doodah again, and this time she could spent 22 years in the slammer. Seems Turkish authorities aren’t too pleased with her 2008 documentary where she went undercover to expose the appalling abuse of children in an Ankara orphanage. Fergie is accused of going  “against the law in acquiring footage and violating privacy” of five children.  She better hope their isn’t an extradition treaty with Britain because she might have more than her toe sucked in a Turkish prisons.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

The Prostitute Turned Into A Donkey Your Honor

No, no, no, officer I swear a minute ago she was a prostitute. A man in Zimbabwe caught having sex with a donkey claims the beast was a hooker he had picked up at a nightclub. Sunday Moyo told the court he had paid for a prostitute in a downtown club but has no idea how she suddenly changed into a donkey during their heated sex session. Police claim they spotted Moyo mounting the beast while on routine patrol. Oh but it gets better, Moyo  thinks he’s fallen in love with the donkey and now believes he might be a donkey too. Hmm, more like an ass! Enter phychiatrist!


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

I Needed Something Nice To Wear!

Honey,  sweetie, darl, no, you don’t go to court wearing the jacket you were accused of stealing. Take a bow Stephen Kirkbide. He waltzed into court wearing the £125 Craghopper waterproof, which witnesses instantly recognized.  While Kirkbide’s lawyer declared her client ‘wouldn’t be so stupid’ as to turn up in stolen goods’ the judge found him guilty.


Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Whoops!

Probably Not A Good Idea In Hindsight

OK, honey, sweetie, darl, I wouldn’t recommend dressing up like a woman to avoid the press filming you as you leave court, especially if you are a friggin bloke! Martyn Crute, a company director facing charges for trading for 15 months without being registered with a gas safety body, thought he could sneak pasted waiting media without being noticed. Wrong! It was spotted in seconds!

Of course you want to see the photos…click here…you know you want to.


Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

ATM Epic Fail

Oh for goodness sakes David Haskell what were you thinking? The 18 year old climbed on top of the Bank of America ATM machine, kicked through it’s drywall ceiling then dropped inside. Yes, of course Loons, the friggin alarms went off and the police were there  in minutes. However, they initial couldn’t see anything wrong  until the machine began shaking. Fool had got himself stuck inside. Hmm, the court then had to postpone Mr Haskell’s arraignment because he was still too sore to stand up.

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, Whoops!

We Don’t Have Exposed Genitals In This Court!

OK, here’s the thing Stephen Coffey (20), if you wear a t-shirt to court with a cartoon character  exposing himself, damn straight you’ll get sent home to change! Sheriff Andrew Berry was not impressed when he noticed Mr Coffey’s tee which read “Why I don’t wear shorts” and included a picture of an old man flashing his genitals. Sheez, friggin Y gens!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Gross, Well I Never, Whoops!