Snakes Alive

My greatest fear is that at some point wildlife will realise that if they join forces and attacked us collectively, we are screwed. Given that, a woman in India was bitten by some mean-ass snake in the middle of the night, while she was sleeping. When she woke up she began breastfeeding her baby before both became decidedly ill. Sadly they both died en route to the hospital. It is believed that the mother passed the poisonous venom through to her child via the breast milk. The family told authorities that they had seen the snake in the house but they didn’t manage to catch it.

See Ya Charles Manson

Evidently Charles Manson is about to see what is behind death’s door.  Good luck with that!  The 1960s cult leader/manipulative narcissist who mastermind then convinced his followers to kill, is about to meet his maker. The 83 year old only has a day or so to live due to an undisclosed illness. Can’t say I will be sad to see him go. I do hope however this will give some closure to those directly affected by his atrocities. No RIP from this loon.

Killer Seagulls

Scientists have concluded that the cause of death of hundreds of baby whales off the coast of Argentina is a result of killer seagulls. Yep, seems those feathered pesks aren’t satisfied just feeding off the whales’ dead skin but are pecking large holes in them. The baby whales are the most vunerable to gull lesions. Sheez loons, save whales, feed seagulls more chips.

Loon Is Back To Hating Clowns

Hell no. A 12 year old girl who stabbed her stepmum to death said a creepy clown called Laughing Jack told her to do it. The girl had told her dad she was hearing voices a few months before the stabbing but 16..yep 16 pyschiatric units refused to take her in. Oh and the state of Indiana declined to place her in medical care DESPITE a court order that stated that hospital placement was the “only option available”.

Escalatorville Horror

After a woman in China got eaten up by an escalator last week after she fell through the footplate, shoppers have been doing everything to avoid the same fate.

The video of the killer escalator

The video of scared shoppers

 

Officials Question Castro’s Suicide

Just when you thought Ariel Castro took the easy way out by killing himself , it turns out he may have been attempting some kinky sex act in his jail cell. Could this case get anymore bizarre? Originally it was assumed Castro, who got like a billion years behind bars for  kidnapping three girls and using them as sex slaves, had hanged himself with a sheet but now it’s looking more like  an auto-erotic asphyxiation fail. Well that might explain why his pants and undies were at his ankles . Hello, he did say he was a sex addict.

The Day The Music Died

What is worse than being the ex wife of OJ? Hmm, try being the ex girlfriend of Kim Jong Un. There are unconfirmed reports that the poor girl  has been executed by a machine gun firing squad due to a “porn” scandal. The ex singing star Hyon Song-wol, who dated Kim Jong Un until his daddy began disapproving, was gunned down ,along with several other popular artists from the Unhasu Orchestra and the Wangjaesan Light Music Band. The families were forced to watch the execution before they too were arrested and sent to prison camps under North Korea’s guilt by association laws.

Want sauce with that?

Death Of Two Legends

Today sees the passing of two iconic figures, Annette Funicello (original member of the Mickey Mouse Club) and former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher (original member of the Iron Lady club).

Psst Never thought you would see  Annette Funicello and Margaret Thatcher mentioned in the same sentence did you?

RIP Twinkies

I am sad to announce the sudden death of Twinkies (1930- 2012). Striked down in its prime.

I Thought Airbags Were A Safety Device?

No need to panic people, but those friggin airbags in your car are deadly. A British man died after inhaling the fumes from his airbag after being involved in a minor accident.The kaboom triggered the airbag, which broke a window, that cut the bag and he breathed in the chemicals. Two months later he was dead from a lung infection.

Want sauce with that?