Tag Archives: denmark

Barrel Full Of …..

toxic time capsuleI don’t know what 14th century Danish people use to eat  but it can’t be good. When archeologists dug up 700 year old latrines from the an old toilet site in Odense they got a nasty surprise . Floaties. Yep, the poo inside the barrels was still in excellent  condition and stunk to high heaven. After the excrement was analysed they found out two interesting things a) they ate a lot of friggin raspberries and b) they used moss and fabric to wipe their butts.

8 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, Thanks For Nothing

Yeah, About Your Billion Dollar Lottery Win

If you happen to receive an email from the Danish state-run lottery company, Danske Spil, saying congrats on becoming a billionaire…ignore it. Seems they made a boo boo. So far around three hundred Danes have falsely been told they were richer than the Kardashians.

11 Comments

Filed under Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

King Leer

Awkward, while Princess Mary of Denmark was pre-occupied entertaining dignitaries at a State dinner the  hubby of the Finnish president (AKA First Gentleman) stole  a look down her dress. What a boob! Move on, nothing to see there!

9 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!

Siku The Cutest Abandoned Polar Bear Ever

The cutest abandoned Danish polar bear you will see all day. Is he drunk, for crying out loud?

5 Comments

Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Alas Poor Yeast Extract

Alas poor Marmite, I knew you well!

It’s about friggin time someone’s come to their senses and  banned Marmite and Vegemite. Way to go Denmark. The horrid yeast extract has way too much vitamins, so begone. Also included on the Danish hit list is Horlicks, Ovaltine and Farley’s Rusk. Some British expats aren’t too happy about the decision and fear they may have to go on the black market to get their spread.Tsk, tsk Princess Mary, I bet you have a jar or two of Vegemite stashed in the palace pantry!

9 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Nun On The Run

A Dutch nun has high tailed it out of Denmark after police began probing the death of an elderly nun. It is believed in 1993 Mother Theresa Brenninkmeijer ordered an elderly nun to be locked out in the cold with inadequate clothing because she had disturbed mass. The nun died. Mother Theresa Brenninkmeijer, who reputedly had a reputation for abusing nuns at the convent in Sostrup, Denmark, is now a marked woman. Despite the death happening over 17 years ago, making it too late to prosecute her, the Danish police are/were hoping the Catholic church would assist in the investigation. Blahahaha fat chance of that! Hello, the Vatican had received numerous complaints about her abuse over the years and had done zip about it.

1 Comment

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

I’ll Drink To That

I hate my job!

It use to be a great job until they banned drinking beer! Workers and drivers at Carlsberg brewery in Denmark are on their second day of strikes after management decided to limit drinking beer to only lunch breaks. Prior to April the 1st employees could help themselves to free beer any old time of the day “There has been free beer, water and soft drinks everywhere,” but now beer is only available in the canteen at lunch.Drivers in particular are pissed and want to have their “three beers per day” rights reinstated. 800 walked off the job (while some crawled no doubt).

5 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Sore Loser, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

The Hazards Of Being A Dog Owner

Here's a visual !

A woman who didn’t clean up her dog’s poop got a nasty surprise when a man picked it up for her and then rubbed it in her hair. The woman from Silkeborg in Denmark claims she was walking her dog home after shopping when an elderly man went ballistic, claiming her dog had shat in his garden. Next thing she knows, he’s got her by the hair and rubbing the shit in it. Dog 1, Old dude 1, Smelly dog owner 0.

Psst Mr Mills was unavailable for comment!

10 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, Friggin Hilarious, Sore Loser, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Left Shoe Thieves Busted

WTF? Sounds like hard work to me… but evidently a gang of international left shoe thieves have been caught in Malmo, Sweden. The bastards stole seven single left shoes worth about $1,400 and were planning to travel to Denmark to steal the right foot counterparts. Hmm, why not just hold up the friggin store and steal everything? Seriously, you are dumbasses!

6 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious

Sometimes Being A Dick Helps!

You guys have got balls!

When you’re Danish and your political party is named, in part, after a male sexual organ, why not have stickers shaped like penises. Oh and why not then plastered all your opposition party’s campaign posters with them. Come on people, there is no such thing as bad advertising! The P.I.K. (Penge i kommunekassen) party admitted to being the dicks responsible for sticking the yellow phallics all over the place but are pleased with the result. They now have had over 10,000 visitors to their website and have now got 500 new Facebook friends. So who’s the PIK dick now?

Leave a comment

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!