Tag Archives: Detroit
Stop looking people the bridge has been found. Yep, the 2.5 ton wood and steel bridge that kapoofed from a property in Detroit has been found, I repeat, has been found. The structure was discovered some 30 miles away. Police still have no idea who stole it or why. Oh well, the owner will just have to get over it.
What time is it? Howdy Doody sale time. The fall out from Detroit being broke is that Howdy Doody, the famous marionette, may have to be sold. The puppet , which is owned by the city of Detroit, is considered a valuable asset and might have to be sold to help cover their $18 billion debt.
Oh no, not even Robocop can save Detroit now, the whole friggin city is bankrupt? OMG, what does that even mean? Hmm, well for starters, they can’t afford to pay anyone a dime. Nope, and forget pensions.They are in about $17 billion dollars worth of debt and filing bankruptcy is the only way out. Egads. Hmm, well if everyone in the world sent them a dollar … oh never mind, they’d still be 10 billion dollars in debt.
Calling Robo Cop, Robo Cop to the front counter please. Police in Detroit have warned visitors to the city that they should “enter at their own risk” unless of course they want to buy a tee saying “I survived Detroit with just a flesh wound” . The Police say they have no choice but to warn visitors not to enter, as they can’t guarantee they can protect anyone as violence escalates and their force rapidly shrinks. Officers are evidently leaving in droves due to the 12 hour shifts and low pay. Yikes!!! Hmm, Rudy Giuliani, Rudy Giuliani to the front desk too!!!!!
Remember 9 year old Joshua Smith from Detroit, who decided to set up a lemonade stand to raise money for the city? Well bless his little heart, he has just presented a check to city officials for the grand sum of $2,832.64. What a champion!
Stand up and take a bow Joshua Smith. This 9 year old Detroit boy has set up a lemonade stand on the side of the road so he can help his city recover from that damn economic crisis. All proceeds from the sale of his lemonade and snacks will go to the city of Detroit, despite Mayor Dave Bing suggesting half should go to Joshua’s college fund. His parents responded with “It would be disingenuous of us to have people come by to make donations under one premise and then turn around and use the money for our own gain,” After Joshua’s story received press coverage, donations have been coming in from around the US.