Tag Archives: drug dealer

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

dunceNo, no, no, silly Florida man, when you fill out your arrest form don’t be putting friggin “drug dealer” under occupation. Hit it Billy Joel … “Honesty, is such a lonely word…….

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Whoops!

I Bet He Was Hopping Mad!

OK loons, I’m pretty sure you can guess where this is going. Ariosto Wyman, a one legged drug dealer ,was pulled over by Jacksonville police and, according to the report, “began to hop down the sidewalk.” The police didn’t even bother to chase him, instead they just yelled at him to return and he hopped back. Sheez, to top it all off, he was carrying a baggie of marijuana and 120 grams of cocaine and now faces four drug charges, and another one for operating a vehicle with a suspended license. Jiminy Cricket!

Want sauce with that?


Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Fat Chance

Just thought you would like to know, Fat Freddy (aka Jose Rivera) a 510lb drug dealer has been arrested. No biggie!

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Don’t Take Candy From Strangers

OK, here’s the thing wannabe drug dealer, don’t be selling candy instead of the prescription painkiller, Roxicet, to clients, they known the friggin difference! Rebecca Martin is alleged to have wrapped two pieces of blue candy up in plastic and then sold it to John Bartolomei and an unidentified female minor. It wasn’t long before Bartolomei thought, WTF this is friggin candy, and reached into the car in an attempt to get his money back. In the meantime the young girl jumped on the hood.You can pretty much guess the rest, Martin took off with the two hanging from the car. Eventually Bartolomei flew off and was struck by another car while the girl continued to cling on for dear life. It was only after Martin hit a mailbox did she stop and run off. Bartolomei was later pronounced dead. Hmm, so that’s vehicular homicide and drug distribution charges right there!


Filed under End Credit, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never, Whoops!

They Will Never Look There!

Hey kiddies, stop playing with daddy's stuff!

So if you were a big bad drug and weapons dealer in Brownsville, working with drug cartels in Mexico, where oh where would you hide your stash? Well it seems Play-Doh cups are good a place as any for cocaine and heroin. Who Knew?

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

What’s The Odds?

OK, here’s the thing dumbassed drug dealers, be sure to get  the phone number right  when making a deal or you might accidentally text a drug task force agent. Imagine the surprise when a member of the Duchess County Drug Task Force received a text wanting to know if he was interested in purchasing heroin!  Too easy. Welcome to the  losers lounge  Crystal Mazzella, Quamian Hardy and Leo Thompson.


Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, Sore Loser, Whoops!

Keep The Change

OK, here’s the thing Wichita man, if you pay your drug dealer with monopoly money there is going to be retribution when he finds out. A man bleeding from the head in Wichita, Kansas, told police he had been bashed by an upset drug dealer after he used several hundreds of dollars of monopoly money to buy crack cocaine. He claims he was pistol whipped and punched after they tracked him down a few weeks later but refuses to tell police anymore details.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!