Hold on to your tin foil hats loons death stars are heading our way and they’re not happy. Yep, expect a bucket load of icy hail and destruction. Oh wait, they are coming in the next hundred thousand years. Sheez NASA, enough attention seeking. As you were loons.
Tag Archives: earth
It seems when it comes to the end of the world both NASA and the European Space Operations Centre love scaring the beegezus out of us. ESOC are now on the “death by asteroid” bandwagon, predicting it is just a matter of time before KABOOM. But don’t fear earthlings, Europe is setting up a series of telescopes which will give us a 3 weeks heads up on any wayward asteroids . Well that is handy for NO ONE!!!!
As if we haven’t got enough things to worry about, NASA are now scratching their collective heads about an astroid that could kaboom us all. The rock in question is about 500m in diameter and is spinning through orbit at an alarming 101,000 km per hour. Hard hat sales are going to go through the roof. My greatest fear however, is that in a few million years another species of beings will be talking about this “amazing” civilisation that had once roamed the Earth. This civilisation was so advanced they had little devices that could locate and catch creatures known as Pokemons.
OK loons, resume the stack hat position, a mysterious object is hurtling to Earth and should kaboom on Friday the 13th. Scientists believe the object named WT1190F (aka “what the 1190 f*ck”) is space junk of some kind but they aren’t too sure what the impact will be. They are saying it will most likely land in the ocean off Sri Lanka but I am assuming that is to alleviate fears it could land on our noggins.
Stack hats at the ready Loons, a defunct Russian satellite is going to be crashing to earth today and experts haven’t a clue where it is going to kaboom.The Russians have released the standard pre crash warning blah blahs about the unlikely chance of getting hit by space junk fragments because most of the planet is covered in water. Just let it be known the Loon warned you.
Want to know how it’s all going to end? Look away those of you who are quite happy living in eternal bliss, but for the rest of you, here goes. Some day the sun is going to explode (and by explode, I mean KABOOM) , destroy our neighboring planets and roast the Earth’s surface , leaving us all but a charred memory in the universe. This according to a group of pessimistic astrophysicist bastards. Good news, it won’t be happening anytime soon, so don on your snuggie blankets, pour a glass of champers and watch reruns of Black Adder.
Psst Oi, hang on just one minute, don’t get too comfie, those friggin Mayans might still be right!!!!