Tag Archives: Egypt

And You Thought YOU Were Having A Bad Day

Ouch

5 Comments

Filed under Sore Loser, That's Gotta Hurt

Trust No One

Phew, they don't suspect a thing

Phew, they don’t suspect a thing

Paranoid much?  Some guy waltzed into an Egyptian  police station with a swan under his arm believing it to be a spy. The bird, which was probably as confused as could be, had a small electrical device attached to its leg. After some investigating it was determined the swan was not an undercover agent nor a terrorist but merely a bird being tracked by some wildlife nut. As you were.

5 Comments

Filed under Whoops!

Monica Chants For Hillary Clinton

Poor Hillary, not only did she have to dodge flying tomatoes and shoes  from Egyptian demonstrators during her visit to Alexandria but she had to endure the embarrassing taunts of “Monica, Monica”.  It’s a bitch being the US Secretary of State…. and being married to Bill!!!

5 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious

Cancel The Funeral

Don’t you hate it when a dead waiter wakes up at his own funeral. Hamdi Hafez al-Nubi, who had apparently died from a heart attack, was being prepared for burial when they noticed his body was still warm. A doctor was called and the waiter revived ,along with his mother who had fainted.

7 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Whoops!

Black Day for Football

Soccer just hit a new low after a football riot in Egypt  left 73 people dead and at least a thousand injured. Things got ugly after Al-Masry had a rare win over Al-Ahly , Egypt’s top team. The moment the final whistle blew Al-Masry  supporters invaded the pitch and began hurling stones at the players and fans of Al-Ahly. The violence that followed has left the sport’s world stunned. Hmm, that’s why we should all play badminton.

8 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

Thank Goodness for Deed Poll

Now that won't get her teased!

OMG, an Egyptian man has paid homage to the success of Facebook for bringing down Egyptian President Mubarak by naming his newborn baby daughter ‘Facebook’ Jamal Ibrahim. She will be pleased! It is also being reported that the Egyptian army, who are now running the country joined Facebook on Friday and   have already got 66,000 fans.

4 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, You Go Girl!

60 Minutes Reporter Raped

Being a war correspondent is fraught with danger as sadly 60 minutes reporter Lara Logan found out during the Egyptian celebrations in Tahrir Square last week. It is reported that at some stage the reporter and her team were surrounded by a frenzied mob of about 200 Egyptians. In the ensuing crush she was separated from her crew then assaulted  before  suffering a “brutal and sustained sexual assault” (in other words, gang raped). She was eventually rescued by a group of women and 20 Egyptian soldiers.Logan flew back to US the following day  where she is still currently recovering in hospital.

17 Comments

Filed under Friggin Scary, I'm Just Saying !

Money Has A Way Of Creating The Cone Of Silence

Here’s a question for you. If for the last 30 years ousted Egyptian President Mubarak had been accumulating assets and wealth worth between $5 – $64 Billion, why the hell was the US sending the country  $1.5 Billion  a year in foreign aid? They knew damn well he was a thieving, no good, corrupt tyrant and the people were not benefiting. I bet there was absolutely no accountability for that money, nor any paperwork of where it was actually spent. Hello, Western intelligence even knew that during the 18 days of protesting Mubarak was busily moving his wealth to untraceable accounts overseas including London , New York, Paris and Beverley Hills (sounds like a friggin ELO song!). BUT did anyone do anything about it? OK, Switzerland claim they have frozen  his accounts but the majority of his wealth had already been removed before then. The irresponsibility of governments around the world is friggin frightening. The role of government should be, first and foremost, looking after it’s own people, not lining the pockets of these foreign despots for the sake of friggin oil. Now leave me be whilst I go fill my car with $2.50 a litre of unleaded.

Want sauce with that?

2 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !

Tut, Tut, Tut!

You know there is nothing like an overthrow of a government to distract people from noticing antiquities being nicked. While people were holding up their stinky shoes in peaceful protests for 18 days, someone was stealing the treasures of Tutankhamun out of  the Egyptian Museum in Cairo. Hmm, and where was Mubarak and his wife you may well ask?

Psst Isn’t all of Tut’s stuff cursed?

3 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Now What?

It took 18 days of protesting  for Mubarak to  resign as Pres but he did. People power has prevailed and Egypt is now free to pursue a democratic system of government. Bye bye dictator, tribal council have spoken and you have been given  the raised shoe! Ooh and they have frozen your assets. President Obama praised the people in a carefully worded speech following the announcement  “For Egypt, it was the moral force of non-violence, not terrorism, not mindless killing, but non-violence, moral force, that bent the arc of history towards justice once more.” Hmm, but the big question for Egypt and the rest of the world is …now what?

Psst So is Mubarak going to bunking with ousted Tunisia President?

10 Comments

Filed under Friggin Awesome, I'm Just Saying !