Tag Archives: email

Job Openings at 60 Minutes

OK, note to self, when planning a daring children rescue attempt in Lebanon, make sure the father (who allegedly refuses to return them to Australia) doesn’t have access to the email account being used to arrange the kidnapping. Just saying 60 Minutes, just saying.  The father, on reading the details of the attempt to snatch back his kids , notified authorities. Another fine mess. Now the distraught mother of the kids, Tara Brown (the presenter), the 60 Minutes crew and the professional kidnappers all face the wrath of the Lebanese government. Meanwhile, the children are safely back with the American born Lebanese father who is laying charges against the lot of them. The price for trying to cover this story ….. 20 years .

2 Comments

Filed under Whoops!

Want To Know Who Is On The Taliban’s Mailing List?

When it comes to modern technology the Taliban pretty much suck. Qari Yousuf Ahmedi, a spokesman for the terrorist group, was preparing a routine press release when instead of clicking “bcc” he clicked “cc” sending all the hidden names and email addresses to everyone on the list (including journalists and warlords).

8 Comments

Filed under Friggin Dumbass, Whoops!

Dear Colleagues

As a final parting gesture a German public servant sent an email to all his colleagues boasting that he earned $917,000 without so much as “lifting a finger”. He then went on to say “Since 1998, I was present but not really there. So I’m going to be well prepared for retirement – Adieu.” Evidently,  there wasn’t enough work for him to do as he passed it all on to his colleagues. His job is now redundant and the mayor is really pissed!!

7 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Well I Never

Bin Laden Not Buried At Sea?

Oh my, here’s something that could make the world spin off its axis. Seems Wikileaks has an email suggesting Osama Bin Laden wasn’t buried at sea after all but flown to Dover on a CIA lane before sent to the Armed Forces Institute of Pathology in Bethesda in Maryland. Hmm? Oh, wait just one cotton picking minute here, the source is “one high-ranking individual at the private, Texas-based, security mega-firm Stratfor”. What the hell would he know? Anywho he’s still dead, right?

Want sauce with that?

10 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

I’ll Pass On The Banana Smoothie

Want to know the best way to make the sales of bananas plummet? Spread a rumor via email that Mozambique bananas are infected with a flesh eating disease. Yes, that will do it. The email warns people against eating the fruit because they could be infected by necrotising fasciitis just like South African bananas. What the?

Psst It’s not true, walk away, no flesh eating  bananas here!

5 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Join the skeptic club!

White Face Email Blackfires

Doh!

Oh dear, someone got themselves suspended! Louisiana State Senate researcher Tammy Crain-Waldrop sent an email, which included a photo of Obama with “white face” and the lines “Do you like him any better now? No? Me neither ….. Then you’re not a racist.”, accidentally to the Capitol e-mail inbox. Poor thing now has to attend diversity training classes. That should be fun!

Psst Not gonna look good on her resume.

6 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, How Embarrassing, I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

Teen Banned From The US For Life

OK here’s the thing Luke Angel, don’t be sending President Obama an email calling him a prick, that’s a banning from America for life! Sheez, you would think the CIA would have more pressing matters than to chase down a friggin 17 year old from England but no they did and now he’s on that US Department of Homeland Security bad peoples list.Way to go Luke.  The email was sent after the teen, who claims he was drunk at the time, watched a program about 9/11. Hmm, so I’m guessing it was obama@hotmail.com?

Psst I bet it was Michelle’s doing!

2nd Psst Hmm, what the hell is a 17 year old doing drunk? Ban his sorry ass from all the Islamic countries too!!!!

6 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Hilarious, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

How’s Facebook Working For Ya?

I swear if I didn’t have such a thick skin I could be rocking in a corner by now. Each and every friggin week  Facebook kindly sends me “Your Weekly Facebook Page Update” email  and each and every friggin week it reads …

“3 monthly active users (-2 since last week) 0 people like this (no change since last week) 0 wall posts and comments this week (no change since last week)
4 visits this week (no change since last week)”

Why don’t you just lie you bastards!!!! I dread checking my inbox now. It’s like getting friggin hate mail from your friends…oh wait?????

18 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

Introducing the dumbass bank robber of the week. Instead of just being happy with the money he stole, the German robber decided to taunt the police and a few newspapers with emails correcting them on erroneous descriptions of himself. Hmm, would have worked had police not traced his friggin email address. Loser.

1 Comment

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Well I Never, Whoops!

Sound Of Silence Please

Some people are trying to sleep!

When the student union at Cambridge University’s Newnham college aren’t happy, everybody knows about it. The 400 all female undergrads have received e-mails from the union asking them to keep the noise during sex down to a bare minimum. Complaints people, complaints. Evidently the student union had received some 30 complaints about late night hanky panky in the residence halls. Oooh ahh. The email reminds students that the walls are thin and the sound can funnel.  Hmm but no word on whether men are involved!

Psst I bet I know which ones were complaining!!!!

7 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, How Embarrassing, Well I Never, Whoops!, You Go Girl!