Tag Archives: failed

Hot Line to Hell

priestThis is not what you want. A Polish priest is being harassed by the devil on his cell phone after a failed exorcism on a girl. Yep, Satan has been texting him nasty little messages via the girl. The priest believes that the devil has possessed her soul and is now taunting him via her phones. Oh yes Loons, he is responding to the texts.

Psst The priest should ask him if it is hot there!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never

Jailhouse Rock

It’s a bitch being a scientist in Italy. An Italian court has sentenced 6 of them (plus a government official) to 6 years jail for failing to predict the L’Aquila earthquake of 2009 which killed 300 people. The group were all members of the National Commission for the Forecast and Prevention of Major Risks whose job it was to keep an eye on earthquake dangers and keep the city informed. Sheez, who knew those low level tremors would lead to a  6.3 shaker. Anywho, on the bright side I hear there are 7 new positions vacant.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing, Well I Never

Your Once, Twice, Three Times a Loser

You got to feel sorry for Darrell Kenneth Timothy Snyder (not just because he’s got a long name) but because he’s kinda of a loser. You see Darrell attempted three armed hold ups at three different locations in Toronto in a  13 minute burst but despite brandishing a hand gun he failed to get a cent. Zip, nada, zilch! For goodness sakes he even tried a soft target, a random pedestrian, who wouldn’t even comply. Could it possibly get worse? Yep, two of his fails were caught on surveillance video, so Darrell Kenneth Timothy Snyder (bless his heart)  handed himself into police to round off his losing streak.

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Sore Loser, Thanks For Nothing, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Rumor Mill Round Up

Leading the rumor mill this week is Lindsay’s failure at taking tests.Drug tests that is.Did I mention twice? Hmm, she must like orange and cocaine. Meanwhile over in Paris Hilton, she’s copped herself a plea bargain to avoid yet another stint in jail. That’s a year probation, showing face at a drug abuse program , $2,000 fine and 200 hours of community service (hmm, I wonder who she’ll pay to do those for her?). Oh and British bad boy Russell Perry Brand has been  citizen arrested at LAX for slapping paparazzi . Katy Perry’s  response via twitter ” If you cross the line & try an put a lens up my dress, my fiancé will do his job & protect me.” (fine job I might add!). Remember Shelley Malil from 40 year old Virgin? No? Oh well not to worry , his career is pretty much in the toilet after being found guilty of attempted murder after knifing his girlfriend.  Riki Lake learned the hard way that refueling a portable heater is way harder than it looks. She accidentally set the couch on fire which lead to her rental house burning to the ground. And way over the other side of the Atlantic George Michael is getting sick to death of fellow inmates singing Faith and Freedom because none of them can sing them in tune!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !

Follywood

I don’t think Pawan Verma thought his plan through when he decided to fake a kidnapping so he could party in Macau. Verma, who is from India, staged his own kidnapping in which he demanded $40,000 from his daddy  so he could go on a gambling holiday. Hmm, it all came unstuck when he got caught picking up the loot in a New Delhi shopping mall. Now Verma will have to sweat it out while his father decides whether to press charges or not.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Sore Loser