Tag Archives: fireworks

Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch

OK, one more time people, do not and I repeat, DO NOT stick a firecracker between your butt cheeks and set it off because  that’s an airlifting straight to hospital right there. The Darwin man now has severe burns to the butt , back and genitals and probably a massive fear of farting.

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, That's Gotta Hurt

Happy Birthday To You!!!

Oh crap, you know what I hate? When you get birthday candles mixed up with fireworks and you put them on your 13 year old’s birthday cake. Hmm, I really friggin hate that! The ensuing explosion  more than likely scared the shit out of the birthday girl and her parents, who were all injured by the small explosion. The damage to dining room was bad enough for the bomb squad to be called.

Psst I’m guessing mom wants a new dining room for her birthday!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Firework Fail

Oh how silly, a woman has had her fingers blown off after attempting to wake her boyfriend up with fireworks. The Florida woman was about to set them off outside his door but they kaboomed in her hand sending three of her fingers into orbit. Hmm, that would have woken him!  Police said they even found fragments on the ceiling!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

You Did What?

Read the news much fool? Some guy, who had bought consumer  fireworks, set them off on the Pinnacle Peak hiking trail in Arizona starting a fire. Hello! Arizona just happens to be having the worst wildfires in their history but never you mind mister, as you were!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Happy Friggin New Year

Oh shit. The Chinese New Year celebrations didn’t get off to a good start in Shenyang after fireworks set  alight a 5 star hotel which later burned  to the ground. Seems fire hoses have a capacity of shooting water 165 ft, not the required 720ft. Dear god, year of the rabbit looks like it might suck!

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Filed under How Embarrassing, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Exploding Echidna Causes Outrage

 

Sorry, no Echidna clipart!

 

OK, here’s the thing Woonona man, blowing up a dead echidna with fireworks is a $1,000 fine. Lucky for him the animal was dead when he taped fireworks to its back and kaboomed it or he may have been buying soap-on-a-rope.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!

It’s Just 4th of July All Over Again

OK here’s the thing people in Florida with fireworks in their car, when you’re all done, make sure you don’t put the  used fuses with the unlit flammable ones or KABOOM! Lexus gone dot com.The explosion that followed blew out the back window and sunroof before complete engulfing the car in a big fiery ball.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Whoops!

Tinkerbell Makes A Cameo Appearance

Photo Tammy Church

Oh my, Jesus has finally been upstaged. A woman from Florida is claiming she has snapped Tinkerbell amongst fireworks. Tammy Church snapped the photo from her phone during the 4th of July fireworks show and later that night when she downloaded it, bippity boppity boo, there was Tinkerbell fluttering amongst the fireworks. Ms Church, who is a Disney fanatic, is now hoping to make a million dollars from the photo (once she has it copyrighted) and has already contacted national media shows. Hmm, be careful lady, I suspect Disney own the rights to everything Tinkerbell!

Psst OK loons, verdict?  Sheez, at least it doesn’t look like Lenin!!!

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Well I Never

I Wouldn’t Come Any Closer If I were You

photo Reuters

In China when property developers want your land you build a big friggin cannon out of a wheelbarrow and pipes and shoots fireworks at anything that moves. OK, well not everyone in China  but Yang Youde certainly does. Yang is just one of many who are being forced to give up their land to the local government as part of the property confiscation rule. After refusing the governments pittance payment for his land he toddled off and built himself a cannon. So far he has fended off two eviction teams by shooting over their heads with rockets made from fireworks. In his latest attack he shot at over 100 people from a makeshift watchtower. Not only can his rockets travel over 100m they make a god awful kaboom too! Eviction teams 0, Crazy as a cut snake land owner 1

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Well I Never