Tag Archives: funeral

Should Have Had An Apple A Day

wolf in sheeps

Surprise!

Everything was going well at the funeral of a young Romanian doctor until word spread that he had died of AIDS. Enter hysteria. The funeral was attended by the dozens of women he had slept with but who had no idea he was HIV positive. Yep,needless to say that funeral went from sympathy to anger in a very short time. The following day there was an enormous line of over 40 women waiting to be tested. So far two have been confirmed.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing

Sibling Rivalry Problem Solved

A brother kills his brother at another brother's funeralOi, oi, oi, a man in London has been arrested for killing his brother while at the funeral of their other brother. I know, crazy , right? Evidently, the brothers got into a heated argument during the funeral which lead to the younger one being stabbed to death. Sheez, the next funeral  is going to be awkward.

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Filed under End Credit, Thanks For Nothing, They Live Among Us !

Didn’t See This One Coming

The President of Argentina has not been invited to Maggie Thatcher’s funeral.

Psst As if she’d come.

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Filed under Well I Never

God Bless You

Vicar uses Facebook to get strangers to attend lonely veterans funeralA big shout out to British vicar, Reverand Bob Mason, who used Facebook to get 200 strangers to attend a Royal Marine veteran’s funeral because he feared no one would turn up. James McConnell passed away at a nursing home last month but had no living relatives to attend his funeral so the reverand used Facebook to contact members of the Royal Marines and anyone else who wanted to attend. More than 200 people turned up, many of who were marines. One veteran told a BBC reporter “We’re family, we’re all family,”

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Filed under Friggin Awesome, Well I Never

Cancel The Funeral

Don’t you hate it when a dead waiter wakes up at his own funeral. Hamdi Hafez al-Nubi, who had apparently died from a heart attack, was being prepared for burial when they noticed his body was still warm. A doctor was called and the waiter revived ,along with his mother who had fainted.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Whoops!

Whitney Houston Laid To Rest

OK, can we stop playing “I Will Always Love You” NOW!!!!!

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Filed under End Credit

iHaters

Oh, just in case you were wondering, yes, Westboro will be picketing Steve Job’s funeral.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World

Jackass vs Westboro

OMG, this could be more entertaining/dangerous than a Jackass episode … Fred Phelps and his Westboro groupies are planing to picket Ryan Dunn’s funeral. The announcement was made on their website along with  this charming statement “This arrogant jackass, famous for his “vulgar stunts” at which this nation snickered, died in a car accident in Goshen, PA (one of the most evil states to ever exist) after tweeting a picture of himself & two “friends” drinking – just hours before a 3 AM high-speed crash left him & his passenger dead & in flames. This is no prank!”

Pity the fools!!!

 

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Brandon 1, Fred Phelps 0

I just love a feel good story, especially at the expense of the Westboro Baptist Church. The little church of hatred had planned to protest the Mississippi funeral of Sgt. Jason Rogers who was killed in action in Afghanistan but the town folk got wind of their evil intentions and stopped them in their tracks a series of unfortunate events stopped them. Here’s how they did it luck would have it . The towns folk drove over to the hotel where the  protesters were staying  and parked their trucks behind any vehicle  somehow their trucks  all stalled behind vehicles with Kansas number plates. How uncanny was that? Westboro called the local police but unfortunately all their towing service vehicles were busy and wouldn’t be available for several hours. Oh my, very unfortunate. The protesters who did make it to the funeral were ushered away by police for questioning over a crime they believed they may have been involved in. Hmm, seems after a few hours of interrogtion the police had the wrong suspects, so they let them go. Needless to say the funeral went without a hitch. Bravo people of Brandon. And Rest in peace Sgt. Jason Rogers …Lest we forget.

Psst Of course Fred Phelps plans to sue but good luck with the cone of silence!

2 Psst For those who don’t know , the church isn’t about God but money. Fred Phelps makes a fortune suing police and individuals. It’s a scam. Read all about it here…. Scam of the century.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Only Gay Caveman In The Village

Archaeologists think they may have unearthed the first gay Stone Age man. Seems the 5,000 year old male was given a big old girl’s funeral. Yep, he was discovered in his grave lying on his left side, pointing eastward and surrounded by domestic jugs. Men in those days were traditionally buried on their right side with their head facing west and surrounded by weapons, hammers and flint stones. Given how important funerals were to these people archaeologists believe it is highly unlikely to have been a mistake.

Want sauce with that?

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Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never