Tag Archives: gas station

Dude?

A cross dressing bandit has held up a gas station in Geelong, Melbourne. Police say he was wearing  “fake nails, blue eye shadow, red lipstick and black stockings” and  had “demanded cash and cigarettes in a manly voice.” If you recognize him,  be kind and don’t tease him.

Bless!!!

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, You Go Girl!

Buxom Bandit

Last week an Aussie woman with big boobs held up a gas station with a knife. For reasons unknown the attendant had trouble giving police a full description of her face . Hmmm ? She is now an internet sensation.

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Filed under Well I Never, You Go Girl!

Better To Be Safe Than Racist

OK here’s the thing people, just because the gas station employee had a strong accent and the owners were Indian doesn’t mean the sealed sack leaning against a pay phone outside is a friggin bomb. Just so you know not to ring  911 again, goddam you!

Psst The police still went to have a squizzy anywho and it turned out to be  flour people, a sack of friggin flour! Sheez, probably for their papadums!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

Why Bother?

And the loser of the week goes to the Wisconsin robber who leaped over the counter of a gas station, snatched money from the register and made off with less than a buck. Way to go. In his rush he left his “Dub” baseball cap behind. Hmm, a replacement will cost more than a dollar!

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, How Embarrassing, Well I Never, Whoops!

The Advantages Of Reading

Ah the misadventures of some poor dumbassed car thief. Daniel Boxall thought he was some kind of wonderful when he pickpocketed a woman’s car keys in Kent and took off with her £13,000 Audi A4 . After he and a mate had driven a few miles they realized the car was running low on gas and pulled into a petrol station. The dumbass failed to read the label on the fuel cap and proceeded to fill up the DIESEL car with UNLEADED. Got all of a few hundred meters he did,  before the Audi sputtered to a grinding halt. Boxall later flagged down a motorist and offered him $100 for the useless car. The motorist in turn rang police.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, How Embarrassing, Whoops!

Oh No You Don’t

Take my friggin purse!

A word of warning to anyone brave enough to steal 73 year old Patricia Robertson’s purse, she friggin bites hard. When a couple grabbed Robertson’s purse at a gas station in Daytona Beach she instinctively  bit down on the man’s hand, drawing blood. As they tried to flee in their truck she hung onto the vehicle. Fortunately a witness rang 911 and then followed the bastards. Despite almost losing her tooth and being a little bit sore, Mrs Robertson is happy to have kicked ass and  got her purse back.

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Hey, These Beers Are Warm!

I can't drink these!

Atta boy, a man who allegedly stole beers from a gas station returned a few minutes later to exchange them for colder ones. The man had nicked the case of warm beer while the clerk was restocking and, obviously not being British, he was peeved to learn they weren’t chilled. Anywho, when the Clarksville clerk asked the intoxicated man if he had paid for them he fled.

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Filed under Evolution Be Damned!, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Hilarious, They Live Among Us !

Don’t Touch That!

The lesson here is don’t friggin press random buttons or you will be sorry and embarrassed! I wonder how long it took to get that crap out of their hair!

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Attempted Murder by SUV

Seems Roger Mayes got himself one big epic fail. After being told he had to pay for his gas upfront at a station in Jefferson County, Mr Mayes got into his SUV , put it in gear and then proceeded to drive it through the window in an attempt to run down the gas clerk. Gosh, it would have been quicker just paying the goddam money mister! Now he got himself a nice tasering and an attempted murder charge for his troubles!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, I'm Just Saying !, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never, Whoops!

Just Didn’t See It Coming

Honey, you’re not going to believe this, I was just about to fill up with gas when…..

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Filed under Friggin Hilarious, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, Whoops!