Tag Archives: genitals

Dangling Testicles Alert

How's them apples, biatch!

Oh look away loons, this is just nasty. A mobile home park manager has accused a 77 year old tenant of deliberately letting his genitals dangle from under his shorts while she was confronting him about overdue bills. Ewh, I told you it was nasty!  In her statement she said his “testicles and the tip of his penis were exposed through the bottom of his shorts,” (hmm, how friggin short were they?). Oh no it didn’t stop there, he then “placed his hand on his testicles and tucked them back in his shorts.” before extracting his penis from the other side of his shorts.Of course the man is denying everything , telling police “I wear underwear, sir,” Gee, who to believe?

6 Comments

Filed under Friggin Gross, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, They Live Among Us !, Whoops!

Doctor Removes Patient’s Genitals

Better safe than sorry

OMG, a Sydney doctor is on trial for cutting out a woman’s genitals without her consent. Carolyn DeWaegeneire was expecting a small piece of skin on her vulva to be removed when she went under the knife,however, just before she passed out from the anesthesia the doctor (who can’t be named) came close to her ear and said ‘I’m going to take your clitoris too’ . When  she awoke  her genitals were gone. The doctor claims he did it to save her life  despite concerns from a theatre nurse on the contrary. It took Ms DeWaegeneire 2 years to come forward.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Kinky

Get that thing away from me!!!

Holy genital sensors Batman. What is up with British Columbia? Seems for nearly 2 decades young sex offenders have been subjected to genital sensor testing (penile plethysmograph) designed to measure their arousal rates. Here’s how it works, sex offenders as young as 13  are asked to look at nude or semi nude snowflakes and listen to a description of rape, whilst having a monitor attached to their penis.The monitor measures just how turned on the offender gets. Hmm, given they are already deemed a “sex offender”, I would guess , a lot! After years of internal debate about the program it was finally scrapped last month because one of the people administering the test was busted for sexual assault.

Psst No word on when or if any of the data collected has ever been used.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

We Don’t Have Exposed Genitals In This Court!

OK, here’s the thing Stephen Coffey (20), if you wear a t-shirt to court with a cartoon character  exposing himself, damn straight you’ll get sent home to change! Sheriff Andrew Berry was not impressed when he noticed Mr Coffey’s tee which read “Why I don’t wear shorts” and included a picture of an old man flashing his genitals. Sheez, friggin Y gens!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Dumbass, Friggin Gross, Well I Never, Whoops!

Bullseye!

You know what I hate, when you shoot yourself in the groin and then get friggin charged with illegally discharging a firearm, I really hate that! David Leroy Blurton from Colorado told police he was trying to defend himself against a mugger when the gun kaboomed his genital area. Unfortunately for Mr Blurton investigators failed to find evidence he had been accosted. It seems to be a sad case of “drunk with a gun.”

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Filed under Friggin Dumbass, How Embarrassing, Sore Loser, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

He Really Does Have Lead In His Pencil

Doh!

Oh for goodness sakes how many times have I told you to keep firearms away from your genitals people? Latest victim of bullet to the balls is a 20 year old Hamilton man. Police have no idea what happened but they believe the weapon accidentally discharged kaboom straight in the genitals!

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Filed under How Embarrassing, I'm Just Saying !, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Equipment Malfunction

Watch this dad....dad!!!!!!

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooouch. A very unlucky and momentarily high pitched New Zealand man has managed to get his genitals caught in a flying fox at a children’s playground at Christchurch. Seems an equipment malfunction is to blame (not his silly!). The unnamed man was trapped by the balls etc by the mechanism when he hit the end of the flying fox line. Fire crews had to dismantle the seat to free him.Throughout the endeavor he remained “stoic” despite the excruciating pain his genitals were in. I bet there was screaming on the inside, hey bro?

5 Comments

Filed under Friggin Scary, How Embarrassing, I'm Just Saying !, That's Gotta Hurt, Whoops!

Damn Friggin Traditions!

Okie dokie, here’s the thing affectionate father, taking photos of you kissing your 9 month old son on the head, ear and forehead is OK, but also taking photos of you kissing his buttocks and genitals, well that’s gonna get you in trouble. Sergio Diaz-Palomino, who was dobbed into police by a photo-processing employee, claimed the snaps  were simply the way their traditional family photos are taken and were in no way pornographic.Fortunately for Diaz-Palomino the sexual abuse charges were dropped, unfortunately he and his partner will now be deported because they are both illegal immigrants from Mexico. When it rains, it pours.

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

A Woman’s Scorn

That should do it!

That should do it!

Here’s the thing guys, if you are going to cheat on your missus expect something to happen to your genitals. The Loons are well versed on this subject matter. Oyindamola Ojofeitimi (way too many vowels) was pretty damn peeved with her hubby’s infidelities. So much so she decided to take revenge in a manner that would bring tears to any man’s eyes. As he lay sleeping like a baby in his bed, Oyindamola was brewing herself a nice big pot of boiling water. She tiptoed to his room and then poured it all over Emmanuel “Ojo” Ojofeitimi’s manhood. She then picked up a chunk of wood to defend herself, just in case he retaliated (as if). Neighbors describe a sound like that of a woman’s scream coming from their apartment (no doubt). He is now in hospital with  2nd and 3rd degree burns and she is now hoping someone will bail her out of jail.Mr Ojofeitimi Said “I didn’t anticipate this at all,” (they never do).

Psst You think a couple in their 60’s would know better!

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Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Thanks For Nothing