Tag Archives: golf

Beware of a Hole in One

Someone in Norway is pooping in the holes at the Stavanger golf course. And by someone the groundskeeper thinks it is a man “because the poos are too massive to be from a woman.” Hmm, no shit Sherlock. He also said the pooping had been an ongoing problem since 2005 and the pooper has some favourite holes he likes to deposit in. The club claims the pooper rides his bike to the holes during the week, not weekends. They even installed high powered spotlights to deter him but he climbed the tree and dismantled them. Oh a more brighter note the culprit is also using toilet paper.

9 Comments

Filed under Thanks For Nothing, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Rory McIlroy Pockets His Ball

Rory McIlroy got a nice little surprise when he hit a tee shot and it landed in a spectator’s pocket. Fortunately he didn’t have to retrieve it.

2 Comments

Filed under Well I Never, Whoops!

Bear Necessities In Golf

This is why bears don’t play golf…too many distractions. This is why golfers get attacked by angry mama bears …. too many distractions.

3 Comments

Filed under Friggin Wildlife

Finally

After friggin 77 year, an Aussie golfer has finally squeezed his arms into a green jacket at the Masters in Augusta. Damn you Adam Scott, now my golf will be ruined by wannabe hackers with delusions of grandeur for the next few weeks. I must say however, I was as proud as punch when he roared “Come on Aussie” on the 18th.

 

12 Comments

Filed under Friggin Awesome, Well I Never

John Daly

John Daly does a “tincup” at the Australian Open sending 7 balls into the lake before calling it quits. Sheez, I hope he didn’t hear the hecklers!!!!

2 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Golf Just Got a Whole Lot Creepier

OK, some of you may not know this but I play golf on the weekend with a few guys and we always have a competition on the final hole to see who can drive the ball the farthest, it is called “the big dick competition” (despite the fact I am the only one without that apparatus). Anywho,  so you can imagine my gasp, shock, horror when one of them whipped this priceless piece of “shed art” out of his golf bag. Yes, a trophy . My first response was does it come with batteries? Now each week the winner has the pleasure of taking this home. Lord have mercy!

13 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Well I Never

Seve Ballesteros Dead at 54

Sad news for golf fans, golfing legend Seve Ballesteros has died. It had earlier been announced by family that Seve’s health had rapidly deteriorated and he had been given last rites. Ballesteros had been diagnosed with a brain tumor following his collapsed at Madrid Airport in 2008. Despite a series of operations, chemo and radiation to kept the tumor at bay  his health took a turn for the worse recently. Seve Ballesteros won the Open three times, the Masters twice. Brave fight. RIP Seve.

2 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, End Credit

Bad Sport

Attention female golfers in Florida, watch out for a purse stealing raccoon. Two women from two different golf clubs have had their purses stolen by the thieving varmint. He sneaks up to the golf carts when they are taking a shot and snatches them.  Hmm, he’s probably feeding his smoking habit!

Psst I bet he would steal the golf cart if his legs were a little longer!

4 Comments

Filed under Friggin Hilarious, Friggin Wildlife, They Live Among Us !, Well I Never

Rory McIllroy Fail

How does your husband play?

A big shout out to Rory Mcillroy, gallant in defeat after losing the Masters (that’s golf for those of you who are a tad confused) in  spectacular fashion. Poor guy was still leading the tournament after the 9th hole on the final day only to watch his ball ricochet off a tree and into the abyss on the 10th. He tried hard to recover but the friggin ball found another tree. By the time he had finished the hole he had lost the lead and his confidence. It kinda got worse on the 11th and 12th holes but by then the lead was irretrievable. Sheez, I feel your pain! Well at least he can take some comfort …. “The positive are that I led the tournament for 63 holes.” Attaboy. Oh and congrats to  Charl Schwartzel the eventual winner, whoever the dickens you are?

Psst I hate it when they say it was his to lose!

5 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, That's Gotta Hurt, Well I Never, Whoops!

Tiger Spit

Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, what’s up? Dude, spitting on the green is not only gross but inconsiderate. Tiger Woods managed to gross out spectators, fans and commentators alike with his dummy spit at the Dubai Desert Classic yesterday. Then to rub salt into his own wound he finished the last hole with double bogey. Bogey loons, not boogie! Woods ended up going from hero to zero and then coped a fine for breaching the code of conduct.

2 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, Whoops!