Tag Archives: illegal

Too Easy

Hmm, how do police discover an illegal marijuana farm growing in a housing estate in the Netherlands during winter?

marijuana

 

Note to owners, don’t direct the lamps at the roof.

5 Comments

Filed under Thanks For Nothing, Whoops!

Isn’t This Discrimination?

tiger 4Oh for crying out loud, New York law makers are introducing a bill to make it illegal to take a selfie with a tiger. Yep, anyone in New York will be fined $500 for taking photos of themselves hugging, patting or so much as touching a tiger. But on the bright side you can still hug a bear or monkey. Seems the popular dating sites Tinder and OKCupid are to blame for this latest silly legislation as it has now become the trend to post tiger selfies. Oh dear,  aren’t they getting tigers mixed up with cougars? Cougar selfies are what you should be banning!!!

Want sauce with that?

5 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World

What Is This Stain On My Chicken??????

Meat plant owner used underwear to clean  equipmentOh for the love of hygene. An illegal Bristol  meat processing plant owner dodged a jail sentence after it was discovered he was using undies to clean his makeshift butchery. Did I happen to mention he had no wash basins or knife sterilisers either? Evidently the shonky businessman was supplying around 60 businesses in the Bristol area with unhygenic chicken and meat. The dude got busted when a customer at a takeaway complained about a piece of wire found in his fried chicken and the health inspector traced it back to him. Inspectors discovered that he had been buying chicken from reputable suppliers, stripping it off the bone and dicing it, and then putting it back into the original supplier’s boxes which had the “health” mark stamped on it.

8 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, They Live Among Us !

Deadly Pet Escapes

Feet up Queenslanders, there is a King Cobra on the loose on the Gold Coast. Veteran snake catcher Tony Harrison received an anonymous call from a bloke concerned his escaped snake would attack someone. Initially Mr Harrison thought he was talking about a King Brown but the caller corrected him.  Oh for crying out loud , haven’t we got enough scary wildlife down under?

Psst Might want to sleep with both eyes open!!!

7 Comments

Filed under Friggin Wildlife

You Can’t %&*#ing Curse in Middleboro

Well %$*@ me, a new Middleboro (Massachusetts) bylaw, that now gives police the power to fine anyone caught %$*@ing swearing in public, has ruffled the feathers of the locals. A group of about 60 protestors cursed and flashed their middle fingers in disgust at the new laws. Hell, a protest isn’t complete without a megaphone, and the protestors didn’t disappoint, with an open mic allowing anyone to express their disapproval with some choice words. Hmm, I’m predicting a few people may be bankrupt by the end of the year .

19 Comments

Filed under I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Sweet 16

Mom, do I really have to wear sweaters for the rest of my life?

Three good reasons why a 16 year old should stay away from alcohol

a) A 22 year old man might tattoo your arms and ribcage without permission

B) A 22 year old man might misspell a word he’s illegally tattooed on you

c)  You might not like Juggallo (suppose to be Juggalos), SRH (Support Radical Habits) and CKY (Camp Kill Yourself) permanently etched on your body.

On the bright side the 22 year old has been charged with illegal tattooing, assault and battery with a dangerous weapon (the tattoo needle) and providing alcohol to a person under 21.

7 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Whoops!

Halt, Is That Bologna?

Holy bologna Batman. Did you know it is illegal to sneak lunchmeat across the US border? Well you should!  US customs and border security have seized 35 rolls of bologna… that’s around about 4,000 a sandwiches worth, people. Problem it seems is the pork content. It has the potential to spread foreign animal diseases to pigs. Hmm, Arnie, you better be careful what you  eat!

6 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never, Whoops!

Heil Dumbass

OK,OK, I know it maybe tempting but doing a Nazi salute in front of Germany’s parliament will get you an arresting even if you are a friggin tourist! A 30 year old Canadian from Quebec was caught doing the Hitler salute , which is basically an illegal act in Germany, while having his picture taken outside the Budenstag. Police were not amused and promptly arrested him.

5 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Carnage Off Western Australia’s Coast

Over 30 illegal asylum seekers, mainly women and children, have perished near Christmas Island after their boat crashed into a cliff in raging seas. Locals formed human chains as they tried in vain to reach the mostly Iraq and Iran refugees to throw them life jackets and ropes but the huge swell swept many back out to sea. One witness described the scene as utter “carnage”. Survivors have been flown to nearby hospitals by the Royal Flying Doctors Service. The boat eventually disintegrated after continually being pounded on the cliff wall, leaving nothing. Australia has seen a massive influx of illegals risk their lives on fishing boats from Indonesia since the current Australian government relaxed immigration laws. The prospect of queue jumping, free housing, unemployment benefits and all the bells and whistles is just far too tempting. Might want to have a little rethink Gillard?

Updates and video of boat breaking apart Perth Now.

40 Comments

Filed under End Credit, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never

Scarce As Sperm Whale Teeth

Sperm whale teeth. And you?

OK, here’s the thing Nantucket man, don’t be smuggling no sperm whale teeth into the country because that’s a federal offence. Hello, sperm whale teeth are endangered! Dear god, what the hell would you do with one? Hmm, not like you could wear it as a pendant!

3 Comments

Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Wildlife, Whoops!