Tag Archives: International Space Station

Hey, Did Anyone See A Laptop With Top Secret Written On It?

Don't worry, no one can hear them scream

NASA is adamantly denying that a laptop stolen in March 2011,  containing all the secret codes that control the International Space Station (ISS), did not, and I repeat did not, put the lab in peril, OK!!! Sure it resulted in the “loss of the algorithms used to command and control the International Space Station” but peril? NO!


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Whoops!

Life’s a Bitch And Then You Live In Space

Thank goodness for nappies!

Oh shit, calling all astroplumbers to the International Space Station immediately. Seems those friggin astronauts are pissing way too much calcium causing the water recycling system to have a melt down. Yep,  it’s hard to get good urine extracted water in space these days, thanks to the high level of calcium in the astronauts piss. Evidently when you live in zero gravity you suffer bone loss and pretty much wee it away. Unfortunately the calcium is clogging the recycling system which means no clean H2O.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Gross, I'm Just Saying !, Whoops!

Space Junk On Collison Course With Space Station

Most excitement we've had up here in ages!

Holy flying space junk Batman. Duck astronauts, a piece of space junk is heading your way. NASA are friggin freaking over a piece of space debris heading straight towards the International Space Station. The two man crew are unaware of the imminent danger just yet but at 10 am they sure will be, because that is the time NASA intends to tell them to get the hell into the friggin Soyuz escape pod. Possible projected impact time is around 1.17pm so that will give them a good 3 hours to panic! Ah I know what you are thinking, move the friggin space station, hmm, they already thought of that but it is all too late! I bet the three astronauts who came back down to earth on Tuesday are thanking their lucky stars they aren’t still up there.

Psst The junk is believed to be  from a Russian satellite that collided with a U.S. satellite on Feb 10.


Filed under All That Is Wrong With The World, Friggin Scary, I'm Just Saying !, Well I Never, Whoops!